Dissecting a Sentry Gun

Before we start, I’ll like to say a few things. Firstly, I’m assuming this is TF2 at 2007: No hats, no unlocks. Reason why is that it makes my job easier, and I’ll explain why later in the article. Secondly, I am making a guess on a video game mechanic. Grab your mountain of salt from a Scout getting walled off by a Sentry Gun and read this post with it. The Sentry Gun. Love it, hate it, we all know what it does. It tracks down enemy team members and shoots them. However, does anyone ever thought of how… [Continue Reading]

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Trophy Belt

I’ve talked about a lot of cosmetics so far for every class. Hell, I even talked about an all-class cosmetic. Well, almost every class. I’ve not talked about a single Sniper cosmetic yet. Mainly because I hate him. But then, I suppose I can’t avoid talking about Sniper hats forever. If I do I’m going to eventually run out of hats to talk about 10 years later. So I decided to start things off with one of the rare things about the Sniper that I like: The Trophy Belt. The Trophy Belt is one of the first hats in TF2, released during… [Continue Reading]

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The Problems with Pyro, and a Few Potential Fixes

In honor of the incoming Pyro rework, I’d like to discuss the shortcomings of the class, and the shortcomings of Valve’s previous attempts to “fix” him. Oh, Pyro. You’ve been a mediocre class from launch, and nobody at Valve ever really took the time to fix you. From the lowest levels of “I just installed yesterday” pubs, all the way up to invite play, few would debate the statement that “Pyro is a broken, poorly balanced class”. Fewer still could (or would care to) describe exactly why Pyro is broken to begin with. SECTION 1: WHY PYRO BREAKS PUBS At… [Continue Reading]

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Rambling about the Scorch Shot

So, last night, Medic passed me the prizes on Steam (Thanks Medic!). Then with a swish of her lab coat she disappeared into the night, leaving me alone with a game and a TF2 key. I decided to use that key to unbox a crate, a #77 to be exact. And I told myself I’ll write an article about the item I unbox. Is it a hat? Or an Unusual hat? Or is it… Now, excuse me as I prepare to jump off a building. On the bright side, the Scorch Shot is one of my most favourite weapons in… [Continue Reading]

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6 Reasons Why I won’t play Competitive ever again

I was talking to my Overwatch-Competitive-playing sister who goes by the edgy name Skully. She’s totally not a Reaper main, can’t aim those guns for shit. She mostly plays… well, anything BUT Reaper. Mercy, Junkrat, D.Va mostly. That’s beside the point. We were talking about how competitive game modes just… aren’t that fun if you take them seriously. Which spurred me to write this article. It’s Too Serious Team Fortress 2 is a stupidly goofy game. On the flip side, competitive 6v6 is serious. Super serious business. It’s pretty hard to take the game seriously when you’ve got a Heavy… [Continue Reading]

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Scarecrow

One of my most favourite Spy cosmetics, the Scarecrow, came out during the 2012 Halloween update. It turns the Spy’s head into a voodoo doll head. What I love about this is just how unsettling this looks. The button eyes with some of the stuffing poking out from the back of the buttons, the stitches across the mouth, the seams and patches on the Spy’s head (or rather, his balaclava), it just gives that uncanny valley vibe to the Spy. And it also reminds me of Coraline. Must be the eyes. To be honest, I’m not entirely sure at first… [Continue Reading]

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Complaining Across a Very Small Sea of Games

I have two siblings, both of whom are better at games than I am. Particularly platforming games and anything with precise timing, which I hate with a passion. They are both fans of first person shooters. They both started playing FPS games at the same time I did, starting with Left 4 Dead and Garry’s Mod. They’ve always played similar games. They both adore class-based shooters. They are Terroxy and Nommy. Nommy is the youngest of the three of us. She plays with a small group of friends. Mostly Overwatch these days. She’s gone off Team Fortress 2, because she… [Continue Reading]

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Spiral Sallet

In general, hats that you can earn (or “earn” if you are one of those lazy sc rather busy people that uses Steam Achievement Manager) without needing to trade for, get in a drop, or even being premium in TF2 tends to get a bad rep. It ties in with the prejudice some people have towards the F2P players, since they are the ones that normally wear them as that is all they get. However, that doesn’t diminish my liking towards the Spiral Sallet. The Spiral Sallet was added in a small patch in June 14 2011, a day before the… [Continue Reading]

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Update the Damn Tutorials

Tutorials are great. I like games with tutorials that help explain things. The best sort of tutorials are ones which make hints pop up and fit with the rest of the game, but you have the option to turn off the hints in your options menu. Games with shit tutorials will put me right off, like Warframe originally did. Team Fortress 2 and its tutorials though are… lacking, to say the least. Well, the Soldier tutorial isn’t THAT awful. It covers the barest of basics of the game – movement, jumping, switching weapons and shooting, before putting you in a… [Continue Reading]

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I Love dm_duel_v1

I remember the feeling of instant buyer’s remorse upon playing Team Fortress 2. Because the person who introduced me to it invited me to an empty 2fort server. It had nothing to do with the game itself but rather the family Windows XP I was playing it on chugging and spluttering. It was trying its damnedest to impress me, but the frame rate was abysmal. I, being the young, naive and incredibly handsome hero of this story, thought it would work flawlessly if I simply belieeeeeeved! For reasons unknown to even the greatest of scientists, this approach simply didn’t work. But… [Continue Reading]

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