Recently, it dawned on me that I had some name tags lying around but no names to give to my weapons and, in true SPUF style I felt the need to tell others. Now this was all well and good but something else was pointed out to me. A few weeks before the introduction of escrow I had wanted to S. F. Crusader’s. Of course, nobody seems to have the one thing you need and I was in a terrible rush to avoid the delay. Because of this, I got a renamed/redesced crossbow for a bad price. No matter, I was happy. It’s only just occurred to me that I could have simply removed the rename but before now it’s always had an inappropriate name. Pure irritation at this fact has inspired me to write this article.
Having suggested a few names to some friends to see their responses I’ve finally decided on a grand total of… one… new name. But this is good, putting time into the name allows it to truly reflect my personality and perhaps make someone feel better about their death because they get to have a little giggle. But, with this at the back of my mind I find I’ve become more critical of how others rename their weapons. No matter where I go there always appears to be that one sniper who cries when he’s set on fire and has his sniper rifle with something about aimbotting in the name. Yeah, that was funny… when it was first made.
I see countless accounts of weapons given completely unoriginal names. (Sorry to say Aaby but “kritzmas” falls under this category too). There’s always scouts with “Playername’s meatshotter” or something, always medics with “STAPH WIT TEH EEEEEEEEE”, always pyros with “flarepunch” and damn soldiers with “HAHAHAHA REKT”. It’s getting stupid. It’s not funny, it’s not original and it’s not what makes your weapons great. Imagine this, every time you see someone accepting a $100 digital wedding ring, do you go “wow, those people must be good friends” or do you go “$100 flushed away”. Personally, I opt with the latter and it’s the same with weapon names. You wasted a perfectly good tag just so you could boast to others about how you’re unoriginal.
But then, sometimes, veeeeery rarely I find that one name that makes me laugh. It could be something simple or it could be a very specific reference. The one common thing between all of these is that they aren’t the usual. This is what I want in my weapons, I’m not here to follow the crowd… actually that’s most of my tf2 experience… Point is, sometimes things that just pop into your head are much funnier than jokes which have been worn down by repetition. Moreover, they’ll likely be more relevant to you and how you like to play.
Personally, I feel it’s getting a little silly. There’s so many funny things you could choose to call your weapons/hats/other cosmetics, why would you choose to simply bleat out the same tired old lines.