Why Engineer?

Why do I play Engineer? Not to turtle, that’s for sure. I play Engineer to support my team, by providing suppressive fire, healing, ammo resupply and teleportation to the frontlines. The appeal of Engineer, however, isn’t just on the support he can provide for the team, or being able to get kills while sitting back and AFK for hours while your Sentry does the work. In fact, the Sentry isn’t even the most interesting thing about the Engineer. I really enjoy playing Engineer. To be more specific, I love playing Combat Engineer. So much so, I wrote about how much… [Continue Reading]

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Why Pyro?

Pyro is, as of now, my go-to class when I play TF2. However, why do I like playing Pyro so much? I enjoy Pyro’s gameplay, both the ambush, flanking style and the more support-based style. But no, that isn’t the only reason why I like playing Pyro, although it is the main one. And it definitely isn’t Pyro’s character either, since Pyro is my fourth-least favourite merc character-wise.¬†Demoman, Medic, and Heavy¬†are my top 3 favourite mercs character-wise, in that order. And it most definitely isn’t Pyro’s cosmetic options, since I prefer Medic’s and Spy’s. What I love most about Pyro… [Continue Reading]

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On Never Playing Hydroid

So, a Hydroid walks into the Strata Relay, wearing lots of black and red and white and blue. Traditional Pirate looks. Floating behind him is a bright red and yellow Para Carrier Sentinel, flapping its dumb, pointless wings. He’s got a Bolto on his hip and a Glaive, but for some reason the Glaive is attached to his crotch rather than his arm. The Hydroid heads straight for the bar behind Teshin’s little Conclave crevice, where the other cool Tenno hang out. The Tenno eye this Hydroid, but apart from the Glaive on his crotch, he’s not bothering anyone. But… [Continue Reading]

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A Weapon of Formerly Infinite Jest – In Memory of the Sticky Bomb Launcher

Alas, poor Sticky Jumper! I knew him, SPUF: a weapon of infinite jest, of most excellent fancy: it hath borne me through the sky a thousand times; and now, how abhorred in my imagination it is! My gorge rims at it. Here lie those rounded bombs that I have exploded I know not how oft. Where be your explosions now? your grenades? your cabers? your flashes of merriment, that were wont to set enemy snipers on a roar? Not one now, to mock your own grinning? quite chap-fallen? Now get you to the old SPUF, and tell those there, let… [Continue Reading]

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Why Spy?

I don’t usually play Spy. Not that I hate playing Spy, I just don’t get much chances to play him. I mean, the scenario where having one more Spy is fine is something that will only happen once every twenty matches. The scenario where having another Spy is necessary? About as often as the Golden Frying Pan dropping.. And when I realized “hey we need another Spy”, by the time I got to switch to Spy I would already have three more Spies in my team. Still, at the rare moments that I get to play Spy, it was awesome.… [Continue Reading]

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Why Sniper?

Why do I play Sniper? Is it because of the thrill of precision elimination, of taking out a valuable target in a single hit? Is it the excitement of facing another Sniper, where a slight deviation on aiming or a slight hesitation on strafing will lead to your death? Or is it the small joy of picking off enemy players, who think themselves to be safe, untouchable, up until your bullet penetrates their cranium? Or could it just be the simple pleasure of taking out enemies one by one, showing the server your mastery and precision? Trick question, I don’t… [Continue Reading]

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Ditto Does Not Exist

You know what? My shitty luck aside, I don’t mind the RNG in Pokemon GO. I don’t mind the rather random research, the minuscule chances to even see a shiny, the random stuff from Gyms and Pokestops. I don’t mind the fact that Pokemon have a chance to flee and sometimes refuse to stay in Pokeballs and all that. The only thing I’ve really complained about is being unable to catch Pokemon after defeating them in Raids, especially when I’ve thrown 5+ golden Razberries at them and they still escape, great curve balls or otherwise. But right now, I’ve been… [Continue Reading]

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Revenant, better known as “WHY ARE MY THRALLS SO BAD, SCREW THIS I’M GOING TO BE A BALLERINA”

Oh hey, a new Warframe came out and his acquisition isn’t as god awful as Khora’s. Revenant came out in his own little update, Mask of the Revenant, with a shitty ‘quest’ that got you his blueprint, but only AFTER you acquired all his parts via high level bounties, one of which can also get you Gara parts. I admit I got lucky (by playing with someone who regularly seems to sacrifice goats to Lootcifer) so I managed to have Revenant built in a pretty short amount of time. I’m going to be honest, it’s not worth rushing Revenant. I… [Continue Reading]

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Seedship

With these two lines, Seedship begins. Seedship is a text-based game on mobile, where you play as an on-board AI of a ship holding the last of humanity in cryosleep, along with databases of humanity’s scientific and cultural knowledge. You have various sensors and 10 deployable (but not recoverable) surface drones, and your job is to find a suitable planet for humanity to thrive again. You begin with all systems fully operational. When gameplay starts, the Sun is dead, and no signals came from that direction. For all you know, the thousand people laying dormant within the ship you control… [Continue Reading]

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Healer Woes

If you never felt that playing healer is frustrating in games, then you’ve never played a healer. Ever. Sure, you may have picked a healer class, but you definitely have been playing him as a DPS. Anyone who has played a healer will have experienced at least half of the things in the list below. Most of you who mainly play healers, like me, probably experienced all of them. Teammates wandering into harm’s way and expecting you to follow. Teammates abandoning you and leaving you to die. Teammates calling for aid when they are way too far away. Teammates calling… [Continue Reading]

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