Variants of the Assault Mission Type

When the War Within came out, it introduced a new planet and tile set called the Kuva Fortress. The Grineer stronghold, an asteroid powered through space by gigantic nuclear engines, is the home of the Twin Queens and the Grineer elite, with everything having a black and red colour scheme. Despite its name, there is no Kuva to be found on it or around it, and you have to go to any nearby planets to find the mystical black and red gas. Now, most of the missions on the Kuva Fortress are the same as normal. There’s an Exterminate mission,… [Continue Reading]

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Someone please explain to me what’s so bad about sex and nudity in video games.

So I was watching one of those shitty “top ten offensive things in video games videos”, you know, the ones that are obvious click bait. This one was by a channel that I vaguely like because one of the people there sounds like that guy from the IT Crowd and their older gaming videos aren’t that bad. And one of these things was a South Park anal probe scene. I really couldn’t work out why it was outrageous, because if anyone’s seen an actual episode of South Park, shit like that is the norm. Another entry in this shitty top… [Continue Reading]

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Painkiller

I mentioned Painkiller once some time ago, on my favourite weapons article. In that article, I talked about how much I like the guns in the game, and I might have told a little lie. See, I like almost all the weapons more than my other picks aside from the SBC Cannon. But then, I can’t just fill most of the list with weapons from the same game, can I? I do stand by my point that the Electrodriver¬†is underwhelming, but the Rocket Launcher/Chaingun combo is pretty much a power fantasy controlled with two buttons. Painkiller, the titular weapon of… [Continue Reading]

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The Other Other Starter Character

When you first play Warframe, you play a tutorial quest in which you pick one of three starter characters. The default option is to pick Excalibur, the sword-using guy, who is a nice all-rounder character, sort of like your standard knight in an RPG. The next option is Volt, a lightning-chucking speedster who obviously works like some sort of mage character. And then there’s Mag. Mag is your third choice. Originally, the third choice was Loki. Loki looks and works like a thief or rogue. He fits well but was removed because he’s hard to use, needs to be maxed… [Continue Reading]

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8-bit Bayonetta

Some time ago, I went to look for Bayonetta on Steam, only to leave in disappointment when I realised it’s a bit too pricey for then-jobless me. But while typing the word “Bayonetta” into the search bar, this little thing popped up. Out of curiosity, I downloaded the game and took her for a spin. The game started with the standard Unity quality settings menu, as seen below: This is a rather curious detail, because this isn’t something you expect from a fairly distinguished studio. But then, I don’t expect them to release an 8-bit game either, so I just… [Continue Reading]

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My Little Kavat

The first two Warframe pets I talked about were both dogs. One of them was built like a cross between a wolf and a tree. The other is a pink Charger, made by putting infected puss on a ‘dog’ egg, which now has been updated to have its unique form, rather than being a recoloured enemy. But now I have a Kavat, a kitty. An actual kitty, not a Warframe kitty who runs around slicing everyone to death while being immortal. Small problem though. My Kavat is ugly as fuck. Uglier, somehow, than my pink Charger. Unlike Kubrows and their… [Continue Reading]

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My Proposed Sniper Rebalances

Well, since Valve is talking about rebalances, I’m going to make a list of Sniper changes that I have in mind. By that, I mean a series of Sniper nerfs that’ll make the game better, mostly for me. So yes, if you’re expecting some nice, thought-out balance changes for the Sniper, get out. Why would you expect a guy that mainly talk about cosmetics to know anything about game balance anyway. 1. Inverse damage falloff for Sniper Rifles For ranges that are shorter than half the length of the 2Fort bridge, the Sniper Rifle will have inverse damage falloff. At… [Continue Reading]

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Focusing your Focus

After you complete the main part of the Second Dream, weird things happen. Basicallt, as to not reveal what really happens (after all, I have a whole article for that!) you get a new ability. Well, sort of. You actually get the choice to unlock one of five abilities, from one of five schools. These schools are called Focus schools (or Tenno schools), and your new ability, generally activated by tapping the 5 button, is your Focus ability. But before you use your Focus ability in a mission, you need to wait for it to charge up. Depending on how… [Continue Reading]

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Quizically.Unrefined.Botched.Experience.

No beating around the bush this time, let’s just start by saying I’m VERY glad I got this on sale for ¬£4 because I still felt dissatisfied with what I received. I wasn’t expecting anything mind-blowing, just a decent length single-player puzzle game to mess around with between other games. The premise is simple enough: You’re trapped in a big ol’ cube in space with gloves which essentially act like TV remotes with less functionality. Press one button to interact/extend and the other to shorten. Solve the puzzles, progress, win. So far, so good, considering I just wanted some brain… [Continue Reading]

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PowerPoint Presentation Loki

I like writing articles about individual Warframes. Each one has got their own character about them. Volt is a derpy thing with square knees that throws lightning, Frost is a chill dude in a coat and Trinity is boring as fuck. Loki in particular is a nice character, boasting invisibility and speed, but being about as strong as wet toilet paper. But sometimes there’s a bit of overlap between characters. There has to be eventually, there are only so many ideas out there. But I didn’t think that such a large overlap existed already. Let’s talk about Ash. Ash is… [Continue Reading]

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