On Gold Weapons

Humans love to customize things. We want to leave our mark on the items that mean the most to us, and as a warrior culture we especially love to own weapons that have unique, stylized decals. In the programmed world of video games, where one need not worry about firearm maintenance or practicality, the sky is the limit for how many ways we can customize our guns. So why do so many developers immediately go for golden guns? When available (and they seem to be available in almost every game with weapon skins), a golden reskin will almost always have… [Continue Reading]

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Vampiric Vesture

Scream Fortress 2014 brought to us, as usual, a bunch of Halloween-restricted cosmetics. Scout gets to be a zombie from another universe, Sniper’s a were-kangaroo, and Medic is now an angelic being with healing powers. Overall, I say that 2014’s haul of Halloween-themed cosmetics was plentiful and good. Among all of these cosmetics, there is one I would’ve gladly bought and use it daily if not for the fact that it’s Halloween-restricted. I present to you, the Vampiric Vesture. The Vampiric Vesture is part of the Dr. Acula set for the Medic, with the other cosmetic of the set being… [Continue Reading]

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DISTRACTION!!!

In a typical TF2 game, you will have 12 players on each side. That is the main draw of TF2 for me, since the larger team size means a team can dedicate one or two players to carry out what will be rather unorthodox strategies for a 6 man team. For example, on a 12 man team, having one person dedicated to be a distraction can really pay off if said person can reliably draw away more than two people from the fight. Even when he can’t do so 100% of the time, which is definitely the case, 11 VS… [Continue Reading]

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I don’t need Sandvich

Cue an angry mob of Heavy and Medic mains raging at the title. Thank goodness there isn’t that many of them. Truth is, despite constantly hearing about how Sandvich is the be-all and end-all of Heavy secondaries, and seeing how many players swear by that thing, after using it myself for some time I decided to stop using it. And part of the reason is because of my playstyle. As I have mentioned here and here, I mostly play as a flanking Heavy. I sneak behind enemy lines and tear enemies into shreds where they least expect it. And most… [Continue Reading]

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My Proposed Sniper Rebalances

Well, since Valve is talking about rebalances, I’m going to make a list of Sniper changes that I have in mind. By that, I mean a series of Sniper nerfs that’ll make the game better, mostly for me. So yes, if you’re expecting some nice, thought-out balance changes for the Sniper, get out. Why would you expect a guy that mainly talk about cosmetics to know anything about game balance anyway. 1. Inverse damage falloff for Sniper Rifles For ranges that are shorter than half the length of the 2Fort bridge, the Sniper Rifle will have inverse damage falloff. At… [Continue Reading]

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Eviction Notice

Remember the Valve’s Great Balance Proposal of Summer 2017? Well, after tearing my hair out about the proposed DDS buff (screw you, Sniper), I scrolled further and saw this: Oh bother, Valve’s going to ruin this for me. I knew there’ll be karmic backlash for the Quick-Fix and Scorch Shot buffs coming my way some day, even though the Scorch Shot buff is totally uncalled for and really doesn’t concern me that much. I might just be scaring myself, and nothing bad for me is going to happen towards the Eviction Notice. But anyways, I’m going to write this article… [Continue Reading]

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Four Things You Can’t Do With the Sticky Jumper

Migrating over from Medic primaries, I’m shamelessly stealing an old article format and focusing on another one of my favorite weapons in TF2, a much-maligned mobility tool that has been lumped in with the Rocket Jumper and Sun-on-a-Stick as useless tripe. I’ve long-defended the Sticky Jumper as a perfectly-viable unlock that created a whole new playstyle for aerial Demoman, but thanks to the many, many times Valve has redesigned this weapon, this time we’re going to talk about the things you can’t do with it. At least, not anymore. 1. You can’t plant decoy sticky traps. When the Sticky Jumper… [Continue Reading]

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Lord of the Flies

Once upon a time, long long ago, young aabicus made up his mind that he was ready to buy an unusual hat. I’d recently unboxed an Orbiting Lantern Officer’s Ushanka and sold it for $200 through Paypal, so I felt comfortable dropping some of that on a replacement unusual for a class I actually played. Which hat was a no-brainer; my beloved Prussian Picklehaube was the first hat the game had ever dropped, and it sat proudly on my medic’s head ever since. But what particle effect? There were so many, and I had to weigh the pros and cons… [Continue Reading]

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Mechanical Facsimile

A Spy walked through the spawn door on a rainy night. The mercenaries ran up to him as soon as as they heard the spawn door open. They heard of Spy being chosen for receiving The Upgrade, and they wanted to see how the Spy is now different. The Spy is changed. That night, they heard not his mocking wit and snorting laugh. They smelled not the odour¬†of cigarettes and alcohol that sometimes gave him away even when he’s completely invisible and silent. They saw not the slight swagger in his gait, or the rather unnecessary¬†flourish he has when doing… [Continue Reading]

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The Free To Play Business Model

For some context, take a look at this video: Basically, when OB51 arrived in Paladins, a lot of complains had rose from Reddit and YouTube about the painfully large amounts of grind that everyone faced, with the only way out being sinking money to buy Founder’s Packs and boosters. And when I said “grind”, I don’t mean grinding for cosmetics. The grind is for loadout cards which players need to play the game well. The customizable loadout card system is one of the unique selling points of Paladins. And this marks the second time Paladin’s business model’s under fire, with… [Continue Reading]

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