Speaking Up for the Speedster’s Spandex

I finally managed to have some spare cash to spend on things I like that isn’t my almost-daily Mr Bean indulgence. No, I’m not referring to the British gem of comedy portrayed by the wonderful Sir Rowan Atkinson, I’m referring to the rather popular dessert chain around here that has a branch near the train station. Anyways, I bought a few cosmetics from the new Rainy Day Cosmetic Case. One of the first things I noticed is this: Why in the world is the Speedster’s Spandex so cheap? Even the stupid pocket cosmetic (man I hate those things) costs more than… [Continue Reading]

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Balance Changes – TF2 Blog Post 20-06-2017

Oh my fucking Bahrag, there’s a Team Fortress 2 update and it’s a balance update rather than yet another fucking crate and key update. Oh my god what’s happening? Is this reality? Is this Valve putting the space left over from SPUF’s destruction to good use? Of course not. It’s a bunch of insane, crazy changes. But at least Valve are saying WHY these changes are being made. A lot of the changes seem to be nerfs, particularly the Scout items. Seriously, these changes are all fucking insane. Yes, the Dangershield is getting nerfed, but holy fuck now it has… [Continue Reading]

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Grim Dragons – A 2D Dragon in a 3D World

Every so often, I’ll go to the search function on the Steam store and type in the word ‘dragon’ to see what comes up. Normally it’s the same old same old. Dragon’s Dogma. Skyrim. Dragon Age. Dragonball games. Far Cry 3 – Blood Dragon. Then there’s the stuff which is most likely good, but I don’t want to play. That Dragon, Cancer is probably absolutely amazing, but I’m trying to escape reality, not be reminded of it. Most games with the search term are either JRPGs, RPG games of some sort, or side-scrolling games. Assuming that you actually get to… [Continue Reading]

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On Rahkshi

The Rahkshi were the six main bad guys in the 2003 Bionicle storyline, branded as the ‘Sons of Makuta’ and made out to be incredibly evil and hard to beat. They were considered genuinely scary beings and were the first sets to have simple bendy knees. Luckily, like the Bohrok and Bohrok-Kal and the Rahi before them, all you have to do to defeat them is to remove the squidgy, organic part and the Rahkshi just fall down. Problem is, while originally the Rahkshi were scary enemies that even the newly powered up Toa Nuva struggled to defeat, we later… [Continue Reading]

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Source FilmMaker – Bloody hell I always thought there’s only one M

As those who saw my articles knew, I use SFM for most of my article pictures. Today I’ll just go through how I create those images. By the way, I learned my way around SFM using these tutorials, so take a look if you’re interested. Before I get to the screen you see above, I first plan out my articles so I know what images I need. This also allows me to look for the Steam Workshop files I need before starting, but more on that later. I do create some of the images during writing when I feel that… [Continue Reading]

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You Can Finally Be Nude in Star Trek Online Again

Warning! Censored images of naked people in this article. Turn back if you’re at work! The nude mod for Star Trek Online can trace its roots all the way back to 2012, when it was originally made by a GVZ user who went by the names meehee and thefunkyone, before his mods went offline due to the home forum shutting down. Lucky for us, somebody shared the file with budding modder Password42, who updated it for the (then) current game. He maintained it until February 2016, when changes to Star Trek Online’s underlying programming made it inherently unstable. Then it went offline,… [Continue Reading]

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INSTANT CAKE MIX IS CHEATING

I’m in a bad mood. I’ve been looking up easy home-made cake recipes. I have been cheated. Half the recipes I have found have been instant cake mix plus the standard ingredients you need to make said instant cake mix. This is not baking. This is cheating. Now, I’m not saying that instant cake mix is evil and should be banned. Instant cake mix is a lazy, silly thing to have, considering that a cake 99% of the time is flour, sugar, eggs and a fat of some sort. Plus some baking powder. So spending money on a ready-made mixture… [Continue Reading]

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Poor Ullapool Caber…

Poor, poor Caber. Once the proudest member of Demoman’s unlockable melee weapons, the only one that merged Demoknight and Demoman into a weird parody of both classes, the only weapon that brought the ‘Demo’ part of the class name to Medieval Mode…the mighty Ullapool Caber is a shadow of its former self. The old Caber will always hold a special place in my heart. It was undeniably, indisputably fun. There are few pleasures in life more satisfying than flying through the air with the Sticky Jumper, landing on top of an oblivious sniper and obliterating them with a single melee… [Continue Reading]

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Pocket Pauling

The Pocket Pauling is a cosmetic released in the Rainy Day Pack. It is a plush doll that looks like Ms. Pauling holding a clipboard, which sits on Scout’s backpack. The button eyes are rather similar to the ones on the Pocket Pyro except that they’re darker in colour. In the Pocket Pauling’s hands is a clipboard, which has a small piece of paper on it that is (supposedly) held in place by a thumbtack. On the paper is a drawing of Ms. Pauling’s face surrounded by heart shapes and a sentence saying:”Scout is the best of the Teufort nine and… [Continue Reading]

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Firearms Bullfighting

Out of all the colourful and varied enemies that appeared in Serious Sam 3, there is one that has a really special place in my heart. Ladies and gentlemen, my most favourite enemy in video games ever (so far), the Sirian Werebull. The Syrian Werebull is pretty much an alien bull. It looks like a bull, sounds like a bull, charges at you like a bull, and dies like how a bull would if you shoot it with a green alien laser gun. However, unlike regular bulls and much like other Serious Sam 3 enemies, its corpse will turn black… [Continue Reading]

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On Rochelle

It’s unusual to write an article on Left 4 Dead 2, when aabicus is so clearly better at the game than I am. And with only 30 hours (apparently) on the game, I look like a bit of a noob, even though as many as seven years ago, I was being dragged around Advanced coop campaigns and the only one I never managed to beat (and actually played) was Hard Rain, because that is genuinely a grueling campaign. That being said, I also know quite a bit of the ins and outs of the game, and I’ve always liked how… [Continue Reading]

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Sven Coop – A 2017 Review

Yesterday I realized that I’m never playing the original Half-Life again. It’s one of my favorite single-player games of all time, and I have hundreds of hours in in from various playthroughs. It was the first game I ever tried to mod (to varying degrees of success, though none of my attempts were ever released to the internet) and its artstyle and gameplay will forever hold a special place in my heart. But I just installed Sven Coop and discovered that it contains the original Half-Life playable in multiplayer! Completely for free, you can go enjoy Half-Life 1 right now! Apparently Sven… [Continue Reading]

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The Field Medic: Militarization of a German Nurse

Along with the rain came the Field Practice, a beret with a Medic class emblem over which Medic wore a nice pair of silver earphones. I assume it’s for communication with teammates and the home base, but I cannot understand for the life of me why any Medic will want to better hear his teammates yell for him to top up their health and babysit them for the match. There’s a microphone on the headphones, but going by personal experience only 2.57% of the playerbase will listen to what their Medics are saying. The Field Practice is the latest military… [Continue Reading]

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The Differences Between Watching Overwatch and Team Fortress 2 Competitive

I’ll be honest, I’m not great at games. But I do enjoy watching games being played skillfully. So does aabicus. And so do a lot of people, enough for people to buy into weird schemes and build multi-million dollar prize pools for video game competitions. While Dota 2 and League of Legends aren’t my cup of tea to watch, I’ll always enjoy a bit of pro TF2. Now, top tier Team Fortress 2 is pretty fun. It’s strategic and fast-paced. You know what’s also fun? Pro Overwatch. But there’s something about them that, I don’t know, feels off. Most of… [Continue Reading]

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Yet Another Shitty Eternal Beta Dragon Game

I’m pissed off. I’m always pissed off, but that’s not the point. I don’t want much from my stupid existence on this tiny, gods-forsaken planet, but what I do want is a half-decent game where I can play as a dragon and do dragony things, like burn villages and kill people. As a concept, it sounds really simple. It could make a fucking huge amount of money, like Goat Simulator but preferably good. Heck, it would make an amazing MMO game or an RPG. Preferably in 3d because dragons are big creatures who fly around a lot, and flying around… [Continue Reading]

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A Particularly Bittersweet Departure

(and, A Particularly Hopeful Prelude) Final Chapter: Farewell, Nostalgic Yesterday@save_clear(restart) A small voice with ever so slight electronic distortion could be heard throughout the room. “It looks like this is finally it, huh?” At the same time, a small group of individuals stared down at the ultra resolution tablet screen. The specs for handheld device cameras had improved significantly in recent times, as had stereoscopic 3D technology. With such a high level of detail, it was difficult to differentiate the images displayed on the screen from a view through a physical window of some sort. In fact, if it weren’t… [Continue Reading]

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The End of an Era

Well, that’s it. SPUF is dead. It’s gone. Nothing more than an archive. Dead. Done. Kicked the bucket. Pushing up the daisies. Rolled a seven. Gone forever. Poor thing didn’t even die painlessly. It struggled through 503 errors and database problems. It struggled under the requests of people trying to back up the vast number of posts and threads, desperate to archive an ancient forum. It didn’t even get any updates, being stuck on version 3 of vBulletin, despite vBulletin V5 being available for quite a long time now. SPUF died a painful death. Over the last year or so,… [Continue Reading]

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Last Goodbyes

Today, Monday the 5th of June 2017, is the day SPUF dies. No one will ever be able to post ever again. Today’s article contains the goodbye notes from various SPUFers throughout the ages, serving as a goodbye to the forum some of us have spent years posting on. For some SPUFers, it was just a place to hang out, for others, it was a source of inspiration, for others still, it was full of advice and nice, community things. Either way, SPUF was a great place and it’s a shame to see it go. “SPUF had a good run… [Continue Reading]

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