Right now, I’m going through a phase. It’s a phase of laziness and self-loathing, but it’s not the same as my other phases of laziness and self-loathing. No, this one is different. It has affected me via video games as well. I’ve basically lost the will to game.
For a normal person, or even a normal gamer, that’s not a problem. They’ll go do something else for a bit. Maybe play Candy Crush or something. But I’ve got a gaming blog to run, and as much as I’d like to post my Phoviverse stuff here, it really doesn’t suit the Daily SPUF and requires too much backstory and extra information for the casual reader to, well, read.
As an example, I recently finished a mini-story arch, Assassination of a General, but if I asked the average Daily SPUF reader who Elkay Theanon was, they’d go blank. Heck, if I asked the average Phoviverse reader who Elkay was, they’d probably say “he’s that little yellow guy, right?” and I’d say “no, that’s Arkay.” Although to be fair, Elkay IS Arkay’s older half-brother and he IS probably my largest background character, having appeared in everything from the Kalsa Warrior Rebellion to the Feralheart Plague to the Temthan Attack to the brief, non-Rethan-based Cexit mini-series to being the main subject of Assassination of a General.
Anyway, enough about the most good-looking Rethan around, back to games. I’ve completely and utterly become sick and weary of all games. I have both Click Team Fusion and a special mystery game to review and I’ve procrastinated on both. I’ve readied Skyim for a new Daily SPUF playthrough, I haven’t launched Skyrim in ages though. Even Warframe has got me blank-eyed and weary.
Seriously. I loaded up Warframe the other day, got my daily reward, remembered I was supposed to be leveling up Valkyr and my Braton Prime, switched to Volt Prime to do a Void alert, did a horrible nightmare mission with Frost, then finished with an Exterminate mission to use up the last of my resource booster from my daily reward. The only enjoyable thing was managing to complete the time trial thing that occasionally appears in the Void, and at the end of it, there was no damn Ayatan statue, just a ton of mods hiding in containers. And I STILL didn’t find a fucking Continuity mod!
I mean, I could play other games. The mystery game looks incredibly good and very educational, but I can’t be bothered. I could play Payday: the Heist or Left 4 Dead (1 or 2), but they’re two games where you kinda need to play with friends, especially if you’re not exactly… good at the game. There’s a ton of new games I could try out, but again, I just can’t be bothered. I’m lazy, and I’m also too busy panicking about my current university course.
Really, I’ve been squandering my time. All I’ve been doing lately is either trying to write shit, doing shit doodles or staring blankly at pictures on imgur and Reddit. Occasionally, I’ll go to the gym, but only because I was given a four month membership I didn’t want and was guilt-tripped into using it. Even my writing has been sub-par as of late, I realised I’d left a giant plot hole in Assassination of a General (which I just fixed… sorry, Thitavee-En…).
Hopefully, this is a phase. I really hope so. I hate being a gigantic hormonal douchebag who comfort eats like no tomorrow, but this might just be pre-period hormonal bollocks.
I hate being female.