I know the universe is random. I know it doesn’t care about insignificant specs like human beings. I know everything is by chance or by coincidence. I know that luck is just that: luck. But sometimes it feels as though the universe is stacked against me. Or at the very least, I somehow accidentally pissed off a god of fortune or something.
Okay, let’s look at a very recent example, one that happened the other day and caused me to write a rage article. My one and only Ex Raid, in which I failed to catch a Deoxys. Out of all the people there, I was the only person who failed to catch it, even with my first throw being a curved excellent throw. Statistically, if everyone has equal chances of being lucky and everyone has the same chance of catching a Deoxys, surely I wouldn’t have been the only person to fail to get one? Surely someone else, out of the 15 or so accounts that were there, would have failed to catch a Deoxys? But no, it was just me.
Let’s take another example. I need 2 more Pokemon to complete the Ripple in Time special research quest. I saw a Pokemon that would have brought me to 69/70 Pokemon. It popped up on both mine and my brother’s radars. By the time I got there, it had despawned. But the Pokemon had spawned for just enough time on brother’s phone for him to catch it. An easy catch, but it escaped. This happened twice today, the day that I’m writing this article.
How about another? I had 5 Abras flee after one throw today. Five. What’s that? I threw a Great Curve Ball? Nope, the Abra escaped after two wobbles and instantly fled. A pokemon that actually has a pretty good capture rate. I have had Pinap’d Magikarp manage to escape from nice/great curve balls. Me and brother started off needing the same number of Slowpokes, he ended up with more than me because two of them fled for me.
It’s not just Pokemon Go. I farmed for and improved 17 Axi C3 relics for the Chroma Prime Systems, making all of them radiant for a much higher chance at getting the part I want. I got through 15 of them and got nothing, most of the time getting the most common parts. I traded my last two to my brother and guess what he gets in the first relic he opens? A Chroma Prime Systems.
Most of the time, it feels like I only have good things happen if I’m with other, luckier people.
Let’s take that Chikorita Community Day for example. Had I been on my own, would I have seen as many shinies as I’d seen? Maybe. Or maybe not. While most other people I knew found a shiny within the first ten minutes of the event starting, it took me a lot longer. Had brother not somehow instantly caught a shiny, I probably would have eventually become dissuaded and stopped playing before the event finished. Sure, I caught a shiny Shuppet, but loads of people I know also caught other shinies too.
And what about the shiny Moltres? Well, most of the group got one. Only one person didn’t get one straight away, it took him about 12 Raid Passes to finally get one, but he got one in the end. There’s nothing special about my Shiny Moltres because almost everyone in the local Legendary raid group has one as well.
Oh and my Shiny Moltres actually has pretty mediocre stats. As does that shiny Shuppet of mine.
It’s not just Pokemon Go and Warframe. It’s everything I do. I’ve ended up dying to crits even though team mates magically survived. I’ve opened crate after crate and traded my way up to mediocrity and received fuck all while people I know get unusual hats out of only a couple of crates. Friends and family find money on the floor or they win a scratch card or something while I somehow lose money, or I never get paid back after lending it. I’ve managed to catch stuffed animals out of claw machines for other people but never for myself. And those things are rigged as fuck.
It probably only is luck. It might also be my selective memory. I tend to remember shit things. But I also tend to remember the great things that happen. Great memories, good and bad, always stick to me. I tend to remember amazing things more than bad things. I managed to get a Sybaris Prime Barrel from an intact relic yesterday. I managed to do a whole Sortie without taking any damage. I’ve found a Legendary core. There are lucky things that have happened to me, but for every lucky thing that happens, four unlucky things happen as well.
What makes it all feel worse is that I KNOW it’s all just pure luck. There is no such thing as a god of luck and even if there was, there’s no reason for one to single me out. It is nothing but chance.
Maybe I’m comparing myself to others too much. But I can’t help it. Everyone else seems insanely lucky compared to me. I spend a lot of time listening to people say how they got X lucky thing or won Y nice thing. I don’t even want to be super lucky, I don’t want to be drowning in four leaf clovers. I just want to be averagely lucky.
But I’m not. I’m not lucky at all.
And you know what? It gets exhausting after a while.