Tamriel is in peril again, and only one man can save it… Medic! Last time, we were ruining a party. Now, we’re back here again, battling dragons. And woo, I have seen a lot of dragons. Today alone I killed 5 of the bastards.
I’m sorry, I didn’t mean that, you Dovah are cool…
Anyway, this time, I find this Esbern guy everyone’s bragging about. Time to head to the Ratway, because Brynjolf told me to. Apparently Esbern is down here somewhere…
You know, if it wasn’t for the blood, this would be a really nice little place to sit down. But Medic’s not allowed to sit down, the world is at stake! No time for looking at pretty things! I gotta get to the Ratway!
This guy somehow survived like 4 syringes. That’s pretty tough, actually. He dies after an Ubersaw to the face though.
Huh. Sounds like a bar of some sort. Probably a nasty little place, considering what I’ve just walked through. People trying to kill me everywhere. I don’t even know these guys. So I walk in and…
Oh yeah, Brynjolf and his buddies. Bunch of cold bastards the lot of them. My Previous Life Memory tells me that even a guild of assassins are warmer than these bastards. Well, you can’t blame them really, they live in a sewer. Speaking of which…
Ah, my old follower! Forgot I had you installed, Phovos. Yes, I basically have my first play through Dragonborn here as a follower. She thinks she’s an orc occasionally, after a few bashes to the brain. Anyway, all the thieves tell me that Esbern MAY be hiding even deeper down in the Ratway, but they can’t say for sure because he pays them to shut up. Typical moneygrabbers.
Riften, your sewers are huge and surprisingly not full of shit. Still a metaphorical shithole though. There’s Thalmor down here, but they’re easy to deal with. There’s also one random guy who wants to kill me and cook me. He comes at me with an iron dagger. I cut him through with my Ubersaw. I continue onwards and find Esbern’s place.
He’s pretty big on security. I don’t blame him. Thalmor are stuck up bastards. I know, I went to their party. Esbern spends forever unlocking this, in a bad-joke sort of way.
Wow, he’s almost exactly as I expected. He’s really fucking depressing. AND he speaks in mystic ways. Damn him. But I’d rather be with him than the Thalmor who have appeared outside. I borrow what I can then lead him out, slaughtering the Thalmor who’ve come to arrest us. But before I take him back to Delphine (who’s too lazy clearly), I decide to get myself enrolled with the Thieves Guild.
Oh and a random assassin attacks us. Yes, attack the two armed people. Smart move, cat. I leave Esbern inside briefly while I head outside…
… And deal with this random dragon.
After the dragon dies and gives me all his stuff, I make some quick visits, doing the introductory task for the Thieves Guild. I stop off at Haelga’s place where I find a very interesting note…
“Bring the what?” you ask. You want to know what it says? Trout. I don’t get it either. Is this guy doing threesomes with Haelga and a fish? I have no idea. I don’t want to know.
With my tasks completed, I quickly say hi to the drowning Riften Guard (sometimes they walk off the ledges and get stuck…) and head back inside to finish my inauguration as the newest lowest guy of the Thieves Guild.
Spoiler alert, Mercer Frey is a real douchebag. Like, ultra douchebag. Brynjolf is boring, but at least he’s not a selfish douchebag like Mercer. Anyway, I’m a member of the Thieves Guild now, so yay me!
Remember the guy I saved? He’s from here! He’s a member of the Thieves Guild too. I’m going to take him out for a beer at some point. He deserves it. But I have jobs to do, saving Tamriel and all that. I grab Esbern and head off through the not-so-secret Thieves Guild Entrance and walk all the way back to Riverwood. I can’t wait until someone in Tamriel invents the car.
Happy reunions all round! Well, kinda. I always thought that Orgnar was related to Delphine or something. But as we leave, she turns to him and says “lol the inn is urs i aint comin back gud luck lol!”
Seriously? Damn, woman.
Now we walk to Sky Haven Temple. Which is near Markarth. I dislike Markarth, everyone’s so up themselves because they found silver and dwemer ruins. In Whiterun, there’s some sort humble side to everyone. Markarth? Nope. Esbern and Delphine say they’re going to follow me, but they wander off while I kill three dragons in a row. Two of which were named dragons that Alduin (the bad guy, in case you forgot) is resurrected.
We get to the temple and there’s a bunch of puzzles. Including the Indiana-Jones-like floor puzzle. Apparently the one with the arrow on it is the Akaviri symbol of the Dragonborn. I wouldn’t know by looking. I don’t know what an Akaviri is either.
And the reward for the most random, ill-fitting piece of architecture in Skyrim goes to… whatever this is. Apparently it’s the entrance to the temple. It’s terrifying. No wonder everyone left.
I bet I’ll come across non-Akaviri blood seals later on… Oh well, here goes…
I don’t remember owning an iron dagger…
Okay, let’s get inside.
So that’s Alduin’s Wall? I thought it’d be bigger. I think Demo has one installed in the bathroom of his mansion. Esbern finally starts talking sense, meanwhile Delphine keeps on bitching about him being smart. Listen to the old man, you bitch, he’s trying to teach us stuff. While they argue, I go around and loot the place.
Finally, Esbern concludes that we need to use a special shout. A Thu’um then. I guess I should speak to the Greybeards, they’re good at all this Thu’um stuff.
Sky again! I love the skies of Tamriel. Beautiful. Awe-inspiring. Oh and I gained some skill points. As an experiment, I’m not going to level up past level 9, 1. because I was supposed to do this at level 7 and forgot, and 2. because I’m a scientist and this would be interesting.
Back to High Hrothgar. I’ll be honest, I fast-travelled here. I couldn’t stand walking up that mountain again.
I speak to the only guy who can speak and…
Well thanks a bunch, mate. You WANT the world to be eaten by a lame black dragon? After one of the other guys persuades him, they all head outside. I learn a new shout, Lok Vah Koor, Clear Skies. One of my favourite shouts! Now to meet their leader, Paarthurnax, at the top of the mountain. Apparently he is a master of the Thu’um.
You know what? This trip up the mountain would be so much easier if I could fly. I have no idea how Paarthunax and the Greybeards cope.
Yes, I DID Fus Ro Dah that goat off the edge. These heights are very dizzy-fying. Would not recommend for people who fear heights or get vertigo.
Hello, Paarthurnax! I wondered why there was no house or anything here. This actually makes sense.
Look at him, he’s awesome. Well, until you find out more about him later…
Don’t worry, I forgive you, for now. Of course you know who I am, I’m Medic. I stick out like a sore thumb. Paarthurnax wants me to greet him like a dragon, by breathing fire at him. He offers me the word Yol so I can do so. I use a small trick of unlocking the shout before it’s automatically taught to me and I get the second word Toor for free.
Except he’s accidentally left the word wall inaccessible. Oh well, I can take being set on fire for a few seconds. As you saw in part one, I was fine with it. Paarthy is impressed with being set on fire, and we talk. He knows a lot of stuff. I can forgive his speaking in riddles because he’s a dragon.
Damn right that’s a good reason. Now tell me how I can save the…
Alright. I’m told to speak to the Greybeards and the Blades. I thank Paarthurnax for his time and go and speak to the Greybeards, who recommend the College of Winterhold. I wanted to join that lot anyway, because magic, so now’s as good a time as any to head off there. It’s a long walk, so I dump my unneeded crap at Breezehome and have a quick nap before setting off again. I’m not going to talk to Esbern because there’s no time and I can’t be bothered.
On my way, I’m greeted by a courier, who gives me this letter. I’ve played a lot of Skyrim, never seen this letter before.
These guys randomly give me some nice mead. Thanks!
I also get attacked by a Dark Brotherhood assassin. Again. Did they not get the message after I killed the first one? Double-sworded girl didn’t last very long though. She got blood on my suit.
I finally make it to the College of Winterhold, get a good spell for 30 gold and speak to this very smart orc. If someone tells you that all orcs are dumb, point to Urag. He’ll set them straight. He gives me a ton of crucial information. I need to go and visit yet another person, who lives out in the ice fields. Oh well. I need to have a sit down.
Urag’s still very touchy about his books though.
WHO SAID IT WASN’T? I’LL BRUTALLY BEAT THEM! Then use restoration to fix them up, just to make my point even clearer. Colette, we’re going to have some fun together.
Read part 5!