5 Cute Snakes in Valve Games

The TF2 community has been going cuckoo over the adorable new snakes Valve added to cp_snakewater. From memes to fanart to YouTube videos, these slithery low-poly serpents are recieving a king’s welcome from the update-starved community. And I absolutely can’t blame them, I’ve already asked my boyfriend to make me a plush.

But the Snakewater snakes aren’t the only lovable vipers hidden within Valve’s game catalogue.

1. Sally the Safety Serpent

The ctf_2fort_invasion map is a treasure trove of easter eggs. Especially in the fan-submitted posters on the walls. My favorite one stars Sally reminding players of the six S’s to staying safe during an alien invasion. Thanks Sally!

2. Dark Carnival Plushes

Team Fortress isn’t the only Valve property with cute snakes. In the second map of Left 4 Dead 2‘s Dark Carnival campaign, you can find these toys littering the ground. It’s implied that they were rewards for the nearby carnival attractions, and I know I’d have lost tons of tickets trying to win one. Their only downside is that they don’t squeak when you step on them like the turtles in Back 4 Blood.

3. Backstabber’s Boomslang

Every merc in TF2 has at least one critter they can bring into battle, and Spy gets this sweet lil guy. Look at him curled around Spy’s arm! He’s also fully paintable, meaning he goes great with any cosmetic loadout. The creator also didn’t skive on animations. The snake’s head is jiggle-boned, its tongue flits in and out, and its eyes glow in the dark.

4. AWP | Atheris

Even Counter Strike: Global Offensive can’t escape the slithery sensation. Atheris is a skin for the AWP sniper rifle that adds a beady-eyed spotter to help you track down those terrorists. There’s also a different workshop skin I really like called Resistance which features a holographic technicolor snake on either a white or black background. Give it an upvote if you’d also like to see it added to the game!

5. Slithering Scarf

Are you jealous that only Spy gets to befriend the Backstabber’s Boomslang? You’re in luck! There’s also an emerald-green boa happily equippable by all classes. You can even paint his stripes to be any color you like!

Bonus #6. Bugged Viper model

Screenshot by Leroy_Wells

This one kinda doesn’t count because it’s unintentional, but I have to mention bugged Viper because he fills a special place in my heart. Dota 2‘s Viper hero usually has dragon wings, but occasionally you could get a visual glitch where they wouldn’t load. This bug lasts even into the playable round, letting you slither around on your belly even when carrying your team.


As you can tell, Team Fortress 2 has the lion’s share of adorable snakes, no doubt due to its zany design and extensive cosmetic systems. But Valve was able to find ways to add them into almost every one of their major franchises. Half-Life was the only universe I checked but could not find a snake anywhere within its canon. (I’m assuming the ones name-dropped in the Enrichment Center Test Subject Application Process don’t count.) But after the recent unexpected Snakewater update, who knows what the future might hold!

aabicus

I write articles! I also make games, release videos, voice act and lots of other cool things.

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