Claw Machines and Winning

Funnily enough, I’m not really an arcade person. I have always preferred playing games at home, rather than playing arcade machines that hundreds of others have also touched. But that level of concern would always disappear at the sight of a claw machine. Claw machines are simple: a metal claw hovers over some prizes. You have to use that claw to grab a prize. Most of the time, the claw slips and you don’t get a prize.

Where I live, arcades aren’t that common, but there is an arcade in each of the big malls here. And I’ve tried a good few of them. Rarely though, because I don’t have a massive supply of €1 coins. Yep, here, it’s one quid a pop when it comes to claw machines. Would be way better if they were €0.50 a try, but, well, these machines are designed to take money, not donate it.

Turns out I’m kinda okay at claw machines

Unlike most people I know, I seem to have some pretty good luck when it comes to claw machines. It’s reached a point where I have quite a few. Well, I have ten of these prizes. Many of which have appeared somewhat recently, due to suddenly getting a large number of €1 coins and also just going to the local mall more often.

That’s for the best, because, lately, my luck has been shit. I’ve had bad luck from everything, except for claw machines. Both the dark green dino, the pink t-rex and the stegosaurus are prizes I caught on my first try, and many of the others were quick catches too. Only the Pikachu was hard to obtain, and frankly, the bigger prizes always are. Still caught it though.

My prizes are cute.

Cheap, but cute. Honestly most of the prizes aren’t that well-made. However, they are cute. The combination of being cute and being a prize is what makes me love them. I mean, how can I not look at a fake Nemo with derpy eyes and think it’s anything but amusingly charming? Speaking of charming, I have no idea where the weird brown bear is from. Reminds me of not just bears selling toilet paper, but also that horrible ‘pedobear’ meme which thankfully has somewhat faded away.

My favourites though are the Pikachu and the vague attempt at a stegosaurus. Both of these feel a lot nicer than the other prizes. They’ve also got a good shape when you’re trying to sleep.

I also like them because a good number of them are dinosaurs. I love dinosaurs. Anyone who dislikes dinosaurs has no soul.

It’s literally gambling for kids

I can’t deny it. Claw machines are an early form of gambling. Sure, games that print out tickets are also kinda gambling-y too. The coin-to-ticket ratio is always pretty damn shitty. But you are at least guaranteed a prize at the end. A very small one, most likely. Like, an erasure or a vaguely amusing bouncy ball. The fact that a claw machine gives you nothing is kinda… wrong, I guess. The one in the mall closest to me actually went back to giving out nothing on a loss ages ago. Originally, the claw machine had two sections, and you’d always win a handful of sweets. Now though, it’s nothing more than a money sink.

Despite what I just said though, I did once come across a very strange claw machine. It would keep letting you try until you got a prize. The downside was that the prizes were even cheaper and shittier than what most claw machines have. Still, a novel idea. That being said, if there was a claw machine that let you spend 3-5 Euros but always guaranteed a prize, I would play the shit out of that.

But anyway, I should probably stop now. Don’t want to get addicted now, do we?