Surviving Scream Fortress 2013 as a Soldier

Let's kick some magic booty!
Let’s kick some magic booty!

You’ve probably guessed by now what my second most played class is. Yes, it’s Soldier. And because of all the spam, not to mention the horrors I’ve seen lately as a Medic, I’ve had to switch to Soldier quite a lot. Actually, I’ve been pretty much forced to play Soldier because a team composed entirely of Scouts, Snipers, Spies, Engineers and a lone Pyro is NOT a good place for a Medic to be.

I could play Demoman, but I can’t aim. I could play Pyro, but there’s either one or billions of them. I could play Heavy, but, um… Let’s not go there. Instead, let’s have some fun and talk about tips for Halloween Soldiers…

First off, weapons. Really, anything goes. The Beggar’s Bazooka fits in great around here. Personally, I’d stick to stock, or use the Black Box. Ammo’s not really an issue here, but the health kits can be awkward. With all the spam around, I’d suggest avoiding the Direct Hit, as it means you can’t out-spam the enemy, but then again, the Direct Hit also has the uncanny ability to throw people into the air with ease. Since there’s a giant cliff that people have to walk near and assuming you can aim, the Direct Hit isn’t too bad, but, again, spam.

Secondaries, again, anything goes. I’d like to point out round about now that with Soldier, everything works well, because he’s Soldier. The jack of all trades and all that silliness. I’m sure some of you pro Soldiers will disagree (that’s what conversation is for, right?)  but as far as I’m aware, all the secondaries work well… Except the Mantreads. But I’ll come to that in a moment.

Actually, I’ll come to that now. Just don’t do it. Trolldiering will just get you airblasted off cliffs. I’m serious. There is so much going on that you won’t manage to kill anything. You think those mini-Sentries were bad enough? Based on the good 50 or so servers I’ve recently played on, every single Trolldier I saw failed to do anything remotely useful. Think about it. Everyone will be a FaN Scout, an M2-happy Pyro, a Gunslinger Engineer or a Spy or Sniper who will just shoot you out of the air. Even if they don’t kill you, that Heavy standing on the cart will. And if you’re still live, you’ll be bombarded with spells.

Okay, moving on. I do actually have a useful tip for you. Normally, the Escape Plan is a Soldier’s #1 weapon of choice, but for Helltower, the Disciplinary Action and the Pain Train both seem quite nice and shiny. The Disciplinary Action means you can get your entire team on that cart and up that ghostly path to the rare spells in a breeze, without the downside of being shot by a Sniper who thinks he’s being funny. Unless you straight off rocket jump (a tactic I think everyone who can rocket jump should do), you WILL be targeted by the other team while running up that path of death.

The Pain Train is slightly less obvious and normally I wouldn’t recommend it, but this is Helltower. They’re not shooting you, they’re throwing spells at you. That damage vulnerability doesn’t seem so bad now. Plus, you push the cart faster. Don’t forget that this is Helltower, a re-textured version of TDM_Hightower. Everyone just wants to kill people rather than push the cart, so use the Pain Train to get to the real deathmatching part a bit faster.

Some final tips for you before I wrap things up. Since it’s Halloween, there are pumpkin bombs everywhere. As a Soldier, I recommend using them as often as possible, but also shooting them before people can use them against you. In particular, use them when you’re low on rockets or reloading said rockets, as a shotgun’d pumpkin bomb can do a LOT of damage. Speaking of pumpkins, watch out for the pumpkin bomb spell, as those mini ones can be rather sensitive. Make sure you’re out of range before shooting them.

Also, super jump spells are incredibly useful. It’s basically a free rocket jump that heals you. Alright, not quite, but when it comes to climbing up the tower or getting to the carts while they’re rising, it saves you both ammo and health, meaning you have more rockets to kill people with.

Anything else? Well, apart from the obvious, no. Spells are your friends. Medics are your friends. Airblasting Pyros are your enemies. You’re the jack of all trades, and really, this was a waste of time.

Oh well. At least, unlike Soldier, you’re not constantly nearly having a heart attack…


Medic, also known as Phovos (or occasionally Dr Retvik Von Scribblesalot), writes 50% of all the articles on the Daily SPUF since she doesn't have anything better to do. A dedicated Medic main in Team Fortress 2 and an avid speedster in Warframe, Phovos has the unique skill of writing 500 words about very little in a very short space of time.

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