The pan is mightier than the sword

Whoever decided to add a Frying Pan as a weapon in video games was the greatest genius who ever lived. Forget that Newton guy, who supposedly discovered calculus and invented gravity. Forget Einstein, who supposedly completely re-jigged gravity and its connection with time. The individual behind the Frying Pan shall rise far beyond these men and be forever remembered by the famous spam-quote:

β€œStout shako for two refined!”

That’s right, I’m here to talk about the Demopan this time. I’d call him a perfect mascot for the game. He’s utterly ridiculous in every way, but somehow so effective and hilarious that he provides a semi-viable option for gameplay. He is an ordinary Demoman equipped with the Chargin’ Targe, those funky shutter shades and the Bounty Hat. Wait, have I missed something?

Demopan
“PAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN!!!” *boink*

For those who don’t know, the Pan was added to TF2 as a promotional item. It promotes the Frying Pan in Left 4 Dead 2, using the same epic hit sounds. When equipped with Demoman, it performs identically to the stock Bottle. That alone makes it one of the deadliest melee weapons in the game, because it has decent base damage and seems to crit like a hacker (although nowhere near as much as Engineer and Medic melees). Each critical hit deals 195 damage: Ouchies.

Combine that with a shield, specifically the Chargin’ Targe, and you’ve got yourself some serious whacking power. β€œAnd thus begins my dominatening!”

The whole Demopan fad started with this image: https://wiki.teamfortress.com/wiki/File:DemopanFadFull.png

As you can see, STOUT SHAKO FOR 2 REFINED was actually the username of the chap in the image. Thus began the reign of spamming trade requests and, I imagine, lots of people sacrificing their Pomsons and Mantreads for refined metal. Wherever this chap is now, I hope they got their refined and have used it wisely.

Anyway, back to the game. Playing Demopan has provided some of the greatest laughs I’ve ever had in my two years of TF2-ism. Charging with the Pan could be thought of as a Kamikaze tactic, since without the Stickybomb Launcher it’s hard to get out of trouble once you’re in the midst of it. In theory the Grenade Launcher can help out, but if you’re a true Demopan fan like me, you’ll never want to use your primary weapon. πŸ˜‰

If you’re lucky and the enemy team is a bit dispersed, the Pan is all you need. I’ve charged right into the middle of a Pyro-guarded Sentry nest and come out with my left eye still intact. Moments like that are what we need to see more of on YouTube… if only I’d thought to record before I equipped the Pan!

If you’re a good demoknight, you’ll know the best strategies for charges and how not to get caught amongst a group of five Heavies. I am not a good demoknight, because all this shield stuff is pretty new to me. Does it matter for Demopan? Heck no.

I play Demopan because I want to run around acting like an idiot. He’s almost impossible to take seriously, another reason I think of him like a TF2 mascot. So if you ever see me charging toward you with a glowing Pan and a head full of scrumpy, just go with it. I’m having fun and enjoying some amazing mechanics, like the rest of you.

I shall leave you with these musical masterpieces, the two fan-created Demopan Songs! Enjoy:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bIg3rygMAuk (more spammy one)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0kYTVfJXRMA (somewhat less spammy one)

Image above is from the TF2 wiki.

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