Happy Jump Day!

For the last four years September 16th has been Jump Day, a somber holiday where the denizens of SPUF honor the 8-clip Sticky Jumper which was cruelly nerfed on September 16th, 2013. (Last year even reddit got involved!) We will never forget our fallen comrade. A weapon of infinite jest, of most excellent fancy; it hath carried me through the sky a thousand times, and now, how abhorred in my imagination it is. A harmless weapon that once stood proudly among the few Demoman unlocks, a weapon that has seen its abilities gutted slowly but surely, a weapon whom Valve later updated… [Continue Reading]

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The Scotsman’s Skullcutter

I’m really not fussy when it comes to Demoman melee weapons. I don’t mean Demoknight melee weapons, because that I do care about. I used to be a fan of the Persian Persuader before it was murdered and a pretender put in his place. I then messed around with my HHHH for a bit. But truth be told, I like it better when things go ka-BOOM. So I only ever ran Demoknight when I ever touched Medieval Mode. In normal gameplay, I prefer to be chucking bombs from a comfortable distance. And don’t you dare suggest that I’m spamming explosives blindly,… [Continue Reading]

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Four Things You Can’t Do With the Sticky Jumper

Migrating over from Medic primaries, I’m shamelessly stealing an old article format and focusing on another one of my favorite weapons in TF2, a much-maligned mobility tool that has been lumped in with the Rocket Jumper and Sun-on-a-Stick as useless tripe. I’ve long-defended the Sticky Jumper as a perfectly-viable unlock that created a whole new playstyle for aerial Demoman, but thanks to the many, many times Valve has redesigned this weapon, this time we’re going to talk about the things you can’t do with it. At least, not anymore. 1. You can’t plant decoy sticky traps. When the Sticky Jumper… [Continue Reading]

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Poor Ullapool Caber…

Poor, poor Caber. Once the proudest member of Demoman’s unlockable melee weapons, the only one that merged Demoknight and Demoman into a weird parody of both classes, the only weapon that brought the ‘Demo’ part of the class name to Medieval Mode…the mighty Ullapool Caber is a shadow of its former self. The old Caber will always hold a special place in my heart. It was undeniably, indisputably fun. There are few pleasures in life more satisfying than flying through the air with the Sticky Jumper, landing on top of an oblivious sniper and obliterating them with a single melee… [Continue Reading]

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The Eyelander has a lot of reskins…

Out of all the unlockable weapons, the Eyelander has the most number of reskins at 4. The closest competitor it has is the Axtinguisher at 3 (Postal Pummeler and the Australium and Festive reskins). What is so special about the Eyelander? First up, let’s look at all the reskins. The Nessie’s Nine Iron is a golf club with strong ties to the Demoman’s Scottish ancestry. The Australium Eyelander is one of 9 unlocks that got an Australium version. And speaking of which, Demoman is the only class to get 3 Australium weapons to himself and one of the three classes that can equip… [Continue Reading]

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Team Fortress Comics #6 is out!

It’s only been forever (okay, nearly a year and a half) since the last issue, but woo boy, this one is a biggie! And by biggie, I mean it both in actual size and in content. Issue 6 comes in at a lovely 270-something individual panels and a LOT of new lore, as well as an ending that makes you want more but also makes you willing to wait for two and three quarter years for issue 7. Before we start, be warned, there are spoilers ahead. Although this is just an overview, so I won’t be discussing every detail… [Continue Reading]

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On Demoman in General

Some articles sit empty for months or even years, never getting finished. Most of my articles don’t, but this one about Demomen has been ignored. When I wrote the title, I’d played TF2 and played Demoman and my mind was full of thoughts that quickly vanished. Some of those thoughts later appeared as a rant about Demoknights but normal Demomen just sat here. So let’s talk about Demomen! Except… I don’t know what to say. But I do know what I used to say. Demoman was the power house of the game. As much as Medic, if not more than… [Continue Reading]

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Why Additional Weapon Slots are Bad

I see this pop up occasionally, mostly from the same person over and over on SPUF but also on SCUD and other places as well. The idea that giving the TF2 classes an additional slot for weapons is a good thing. Or that having an additional slot would open up for more, uh, stuff. Well, here I am, stamping on that idea. Additional weapon slots are a bad idea, and today, I am telling you why. Let’s get the first obvious reason out of the way first. We have a LOT of weapons in Team Fortress 2. Medic, Engineer and… [Continue Reading]

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Gargh! We’re all pirates ‘ere!

So, a Demoknight walks into a bar. He’s all dressed up in pirate cosmetics, parrot on his shoulder, a stupid peg leg, that damn Bounty Hat spitting coins everywhere, carrying a Persian Persuader. He’s also got a Tide Turner, but for some reason, it’s strapped to his crotch rather than his arm. Everyone’s giving him funny looks, but no one really wants to ask this drunken Demoknight what’s going on. Finally, the Demoknight makes it to the bar and orders a shot of whiskey, before demanding the entire bottle. The Sniper behind the bar finally decides to ask what’s up… [Continue Reading]

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Demoknight is the wrong class and here’s why

You Demoknights are all already grabbing your pitchforks from the title alone, ready to slice my head off. If you are considering such actions, wait until the end of the article. But seriously, Demoknight is wrong. An explosive, high damage, explosive class that exists to blow up nests of Engineers, giving all that up so he can run around with a sword and shield and essentially less mobility (unless you are like Reima and co.) to deal single target damage sounds absolutely ludicrous. It’s DEMOman, for crying out loud! But the thing is, I am not against a melee-orientated class.… [Continue Reading]

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