Surgeon’s Sidearms
What always irritates me when I see Medic cosmetics is that they rarely portray Medic’s medical practice properly. Most cosmetics portray Medic as a doctor. A proper medical doctor. With cosmetics like this one, this one, this one, and this one. and the fact that he’s running around with a Medi Gun in a shiny white labcoat, anyone not familiar with the lore and doesn’t pay attention to the voicelines would’ve thought Medic to be a Hippocrates-loving, pacifistic, and compassionate guardian angel. Meanwhile, the real Medic is an absolute psychopath with his skills being a side effect of his morbid curiosity. Did you not see his gun that shoot syringes and that bloody saw he’s swinging around? He’s not a doctor, he’s a mad doctor! What’s the difference? Well, the difference being one is a job and the other’s a mental sickness!
Granted, Medic’s portrayal as a sadistic madman is a lot more nuanced. He isn’t exactly someone who runs around cackling maniacally while swinging a bonesaw. Thus, having the Medic look more professional and proper does form a nice contrast with his bloodthirsty tendencies. However, I just really want something that lets my in-game avatar look like he snapped completely and is just out to pry open your skull. The Mad Doktor set is Halloween restricted, the Smock Surgeon… is OK, but it doesn’t look that psychotic. The Gauzed Gaze is a very in-your-face cosmetic on your face for this purpose, but is there anything else?
This set of flesh cutters were added during Scream Fortress 2016 and is a perfect embodiment of unconventional medicine. I am pretty sure strapping scalpels and syringes on your arm is the number one way to give your teammates infections if you actually use them. There are only two reasons why you will strap medical equipment on your arms. One: you are constantly in a rush and need to administer surgery as soon as possible just to keep your team alive in the heat of battle, like me whenever I play Medic. That could be the case if not for the aforementioned infection issue. Two: you are just there to slice people up, gently making an incision for the blood to slowly flow out with the poor guy’s life, as he looks in fear and desperation at your gleeful face, begging for the death that he was promised but doesn’t seem to come quickly enough… Well, you get the picture. Bottom line, a person strapping blades onto himself isn’t looking to heal, he’s looking to harvest pain and fear. I personally would’ve wished for them to be bloodied and slightly rusted to further drive the point across, but that’s just me.
I personally quite like this cosmetic, although the bunch of tools on the Medic’s breast pocket does annoy me to no end. It clips through most shirt cosmetics and just look like a bunch of metal scrap buried in cloth. Although I must say, the leather straps on the Medic’s forearm are really nicely detailed. Overall, it stays rather close to the Medic’s character, it’s well made, doesn’t affect the Medic’s silhouette by much, and is a very unique looking cosmetic that stands out from the others. It’s pretty good.
As for what I’ll wear with it, the Unknown Mann is fine, but cosmetics that covers most of the Medic’s face makes him look less human and more detached, perfect for a man out for violence on his fellow men. The Practitioner’s Processing Mask, Gauzed Gaze, Colossal Cranium and Medi-Mask play this role admirably. If you want the classic mad doctor hairdo, the Wilson Weave should suffice, especially if it’s painted white. Otherwise, any medical-themed cosmetic should do.
