Getting rid of 2 years worth of memories.

So, recently I liquidated my TF2 babies and turned them to raw cash.

And by babies I mean my favourite and most sentimental items.

And by raw cash I mean Steam wallet money.

It’s a weird feeling parting with something you’ve been with for so long, as embarrassing as it might sound, after spending so much time with them, I felt like those cosmetics were a part of me, mostly because before buying them I spend hours deciding on it, and even more so because of them being acquired via trading instead of actual money which means that a lot of effort went into each and ever one of them.

And I never regretted it.

Most of those items were with me from the beginning of my TF2 “career”, they were with me when I was a noob, and they were with me when I was slightly less of a noob, and over the large period of time I was playing, it was natural that I would form an attachment for them sooner or later.

Even as I slowly saw myself drifting from TF2 and taking interest in other games I would still regularly log on and mess around in trade servers just because it would give me a chance of admiring the characters I spent so much time and effort creating.

As time went on, I found myself drifting further and further from TF2 , not even bothering playing on trade servers, but no matter how little I played, I still refused to even think about harming my favorite items, that was just inconceivable to me. That is of course, until I found a game that I had as much interest in, as I had for tf2 when I started playing, to the point where it rivaled my love for TF2. Until then, despite not playing TF2 as much as other games, I still considered it my “main” game. It was after all, the game that introduced me to steam, it was the first game I spent money on and it still to this day remains the game I have the most hours in.

I met most of my steam friends though TF2, thanks to TF2 trading I got my hands on a lot of games for free, and long story short, it is the game I was and still is the most invested in, so despite seriously thinking about selling my babies, I still was mostly against the idea.
That is, until I had a chat with aabicus, he had gone through a similar experience selling most of his TF2 items to invest in a game called Loadout, (which is really great by the way, you should give it a try, it might be your last chance at this point) so he had a lot to say on the subject, it was him in fact that told me to write an article about this, his 2 most important quotes were these:

“No point sitting on a TF2 fortune if you want to have a fortune somewhere else.”
And he was right with that, because it’s just the truth, no point hoarding fortune if you aren’t gonna use it, but in my opinion the most interesting quote was this one:
“Pick a few sentimental items you couldn’t bear to lose, for me it was my birds, then your sentimental items will remind you of what once was.”

This quote is the most interesting because it got me thinking about this, because I believe part of it applies to everyone, even a little:
When I started playing TF2, I was playing normal matches regularly, entering progressively higher skill servers and even giving lobbies a try, I had a genuine love for the game itself, and I reach the point where I believe was my peak. Slowly, as I started playing more and more, I grew an interest in cosmetics slowly acquiring more and more, tailoring my toons to look just like I wanted, losing interest in team fortress 2 and acquiring interest in trade fortress 2, to the point where I was that guy.

Yeah you know that guy, that starts trading with the only medic in the middle of the match, because he likes his hat?

My love started shifting from the gameplay of the game, to the cosmetics of my characters, and I was split, 50% of my interest was in gameplay, 50% in my look. And after a while I didn’t even care about that, instead my interest was focused on wealth, I didn’t trade new cosmetics because I wanted to use them instead I traded for them because I knew they would increase my net value, at that point, I had completely lost interest in the gameplay and I was split between 50% of how well I looked, and 50% of how much wealth I had accumulated.

And yet, even while I was at that stage, I STILL didn’t want to get rid of my cosmetics despite the fact that no one would see them again.

The point I believe that applies to most of us, is that when we acquire cosmetics, sooner or later, we start caring for them as much as we care for the game, if a little less.

But like I said, then I had a chat with aabicus, and it’s his quote that helped move on with the deed. “Don’t sit on a TF2 fortune if you want to have a fortune somewhere else.”

And so I did.

I put up my most valuable, and sentimental items for sale. Just like that, years of memories and time with them gone in the blink of an eye.
For me the hardest part was the action and not the aftermath. Spending an hour or so, deciding whether or not its worth it to keep items I’ll never use again. Though, once I sold the items, I felt relieved, because I couldn’t change my mind after that. I thought to myself, “Well the choice is done. No point moping over it”

Besides. The most sentimental item of all that I didn’t sell, was the most worthless one, my Ghastlierest Gibus. It’s easy to form an attachment to wealth. But when you form an attachment to something completely worthless. That’s when you acquire something truly priceless.

Maybe that was a good thing. Now when I start playing TF2 again, I can stop visiting trade servers and play a serious match for once.