Surviving Scream Fortress 2013 as a Medic

So many Pyros... And so many Pyro cosmetics!
So many Pyros… What can a Medic do?

“What? Surviving Scream Fortress? As a Medic? Surely that should be a piece of cake? It’s just like any other map!” You’re serious? It’s nothing like any other map. It’s an event based on one of the most deathmatch-y maps around, with more spam and confusion than you can shake a stick at. Throw in your normal Hightower threats like Mini-Sentries, and a whole new extra pit for Pyros, Scouts and explosive classes to launch you into, it’s nigh impossible to get around as a Medic.

Well, not impossible, but it’s far harder than most Halloween events. Today, we’ll be looking at a few tips you can use to last at least a bit longer out there…

Let’s be honest here. At the best of times, Hightower isn’t a good place for a Medic. With its large, sweeping views and a lack of things to hide behind, Mini-sentries and Snipers lurk behind every corner and stand proudly on every high up point. So what on earth (or in hell) can we do on the same map, but with extra hazards?

Get some spells

This is one of the most important things for you to do. You’re a Medic, yes, you’re normally not supposed to fight, but this is a free-for-all. Get some spells and bloody use them. See an enemy within 10 ft of you? Use that spell. The best spells for Medics are invisibility, high-jump and teleport, all of which can be used to get out of nasty situations. High-jump also heals you a tiny bit. The Uber spell is alright, but you’re not using it for the Uber, you’re using it for the heal.

The aggressive spells are worth using too, even if you ARE a passive Medic like me. They can separate you from life and death and give you a slime chance to make a getaway.

Try to get the Ultra Spells

This one’s a must. Follow your team mates up the magical ghost path. Not only will they protect you (hopefully) but you’ll save your patients from sneaky Snipers.

Pyros are both your best friend and your enemy!

Because of the nature of Helltower, with two pits to airblast people down and a whole separate area willed with lava to airblast more people into, Pyros are incredibly common. They’re everywhere. And they are a force to be reckoned with. Treat all enemy Pyros as if they’re going to airblast you right now, all the time. At the same time, it’s good to stick with friendly Pyros, who will protect you from enemies and will hopefully put you out when you catch fire. As one of the spells sets you on fire, you’ll be glad to see a friendly Pyro. While you’re at it, learn to airstrafe. Because Soldiers, Scouts and Demomen will be trying to kill you too.

Stay near the cart

This one’s also fairly obvious, but it needs to be said. Most of the health is in awkward places, either right out in the open, in front of giant pits you can be pushed into or next to bombs. The biggest health kit is in a shack with an entire wall missing. There are two medium kits, one on the tower near the two bomb lifts and one further down, next to a bottomless pit. There are two similar health kits by the cart starting points, secluded and protected by pumpkin bombs. There are small health kits scattered around in safer locations, but generally running for health isn’t always safe. But that cart is a level 1 dispenser that will also refill your ammo. The cart also acts as a large, moving piece of cover, possibly more so now it’s a mine cart that’s easier to stand on.

Use the Quick Fix, maybe

The Stock Medi Gun is great, and the Vaccinator can be fairly useful, but the Quick Fix, with its Megaheal overheal and faster charge rate, not to mention the fact that it’s unaffected by the 142.5% ubercharge rate cap, means that it works nicely in a spammy McSpamfest environment. Also, with the Megaheal, you’re temporarily immune to being airblasted. I’ll be honest here, this is just a tip. The Stock Medi Gun almost always works too.

Maybe you'll make it, maybe you won't. But you'll still look awesome...
Maybe you’ll make it, maybe you won’t. But you’ll still look awesome…

Change Class…

Worst case scenario, just change class. I’d suggest Soldier. High health, high mobility. Or you could just go Gunslinger Engineer and annoy everyone…


Medic, also known as Phovos (or occasionally Dr Retvik Von Scribblesalot), writes 50% of all the articles on the Daily SPUF since she doesn't have anything better to do. A dedicated Medic main in Team Fortress 2 and an avid speedster in Warframe, Phovos has the unique skill of writing 500 words about very little in a very short space of time.

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