Ho, there, ye wee SPUFers, it is I, Sir Donald Demoman, and I’m postin’ on this here blog aboot a competition ah’m holdin’- a celebration of both the arts and the best hat in the game, the Scotsman’s Stove Pipe. Ye see, the Stove Pipe has defined me world fer as long as I can remember. Me mum says I was born with a band of ribbon in me mouth, hoho!
Anyways, I’m soon to be off on a grand adventure to find the mysterious land of Hydro! The scientists say that it doesn’t exist, that the legends of its past population are simply myth, but what do they know? So, it’s up to ye, the SPUFers, to hang onto my most cherished Stove Pipes until I return, if I do!
There are twenty-nine Pipes in all, as follows, as well as the competition linked with them!
1. Sir Donald’s Team Spirit Pipe of Classic Character Coordination (Draw a solo mercenary, vanilla. No hats, no miscs.)
2. Sir Donald’s Waterlogged Lab Coat Pipe of Scenic Skyboxery ( Draw a landscape from TF2 or a picture of a location. think a portrait of a deserted Lumberyard.)
3. Sir Donald’s Value of Teamwork Pipe of Firearm Frescoes (Draw a picture focusing on a weapon in TF2.)
4.(Sir Donald’s Operator’s Overalls Pipe of Altered Armed Aspect (Draw a TF2 class in a nice/good-looking/themed item getup.)
5. Sir Donald’s Abundance of Tinge Pipe: The Empire Strikes Back (draw a picture of a TF2 crossover with another piece of media.)
6. Sir Donald’s Balaclavas Pipe of Violently Voiding Vitality (Draw a picture of TF2 combat or a TF2 warzone.)
7. Sir Donald’s Debonair Stovepipe That Looks Almost Like A Similar But More Famous Stovepipe (Draw a parody of an existing piece of art. Make sure to cite your inspiration.)
Literary Leviathans! (Textual)
8. Sir Donald’s Stovepipe / Of Writing Like Five-Sev-Five / See It It Is Orange (Write a TF2 haiku.)
9. Sir Donald’s Business Pants Pipe of Nary a Tripe (write a rhyming poem about TF2.)
10. Sir Donald’s Radigan Pipe of Basically all of English 9 through 12 (Write a Free-verse poem about TF2.)
11. Sir Donald’s Muskelmannbraun Pipe of Short Shtories (Write a short story about TF2.)
12. Sir Donald’s Totally Not At All Counterfeited Lime Legal Notice That Looks Like A Stovepipe (Write a parody of an existing poem or short story and tune t to be TF2-themed. Make sure to cite your inspiration.)
13.Sir Donald’s Regretfully Hideous Pink Pipe of Purposeful Deplorement (Write an intentionally sloppily written piece about TF2.)
Media Medallions! (Non-textual)
14. Sir Donald’s Green Dream He Had (Write a speech about TF2 and then record it in an audio or video format.)
15. Sir Donald’s Salmon Pipe of Team Fortress Covers (Write TF2-themed lyrics to a non-TF2 song and then perform it for us in an audio or video format.)
16. Sir Donald’s Olive Pipe of Singing to Slaughter Songs (Write lyrics to an official song from the TF2 soundtrack and then record it for us in an audio or video format.)
17. Sir Donald’s Stovepipe-shaped Slate Stovepipe Sculpture (Create a TF2-themed sculpture.)
18. Sir Donald’s Violet Pipe of Delicious Decadence (create a food item inspired by TF2. Do not do a Sandvich or Ham Shank.)
19. Sir Donald’s Tincture Pipe of Forging False Firearms (make a replica of a TF2 weapon irl)
20. Sir Donald’s Golden Pipe of Scenery Sightseeing (Take a non set-up screenshot of TF2.)
21. Sir Donald’s After Eight Pipe of Professional Pompadury (take a demo or replay of a comp, pug or MGE matchup and put it on Youtube for us.)
22. Sir Donald’s Cream Spirit Pipe of Pardonable Public Pressings (take a replay or demo of a pub match and put it on Youtube for us.)
23. Sir Donald’s Mint Pipe of Ridiculous Replay Romping (take a demo or replay of a funny happening in TF2 and put it up on Youtube for us)
24. Sir Donald’s Light Pink Pipe of Night-Time Fuel Terrors (Make a frag video and put it up on Youtube for us.)
25. Sir Donald’s Rustic Pipe of Imagineering Injury Implements (come up with an idea for a new weapon.)
26. Sir Donald’s Black Pipe of Class Creation (come up with the perfect tenth class.)
27. Sir Donald’s Purple Pipe of Tinkering with Technicalities (Balance an existing weapon.)
28. Sir Donald’s Grey Pipe of Empowering Pyromaniacs (Make the Pyro better.)
29. Sir Donald’s Greed Pipe of Powerful Persuasion (Tell us why you deserve this Pipe.)
That’s all me Pipes, laddies and lassies. Now, ye have until the twenty-ninth of September to enter for these competitions! At that time, your six judges will pick the best entries and they’ll deliver the Pipes for me. I’ll already be off strangling a chimera or summat. Rules and regulations can be found in the thread. Now go make some art, ye ninnies!
Read more about this contest (including the entries) here! The Daily SPUF will be doing an expose on the winners when the time comes, so jump in!