Not Dawnguard – Some Sort of Strange Bunch of Dungeons and Dragons-related Words

For some reason I decided to write up a really stupid campaign based on how Dawnguard, the DLC for Skyrim, should have gone. Considering I’ll probably never actually be a dungeon master and be able to do a campaign, I’m going to dump this wall of text for you, a whole one-off campaign with maps but only suggested enemies, for you to play if you want to. It’s all free to use because it’s an obvious parody and isn’t even very long. I’ve also gone and made a bunch of maps for this campaign, which you can download by clicking… [Continue Reading]

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More Rambling About Dawnguard

I recently picked up Skyrim again in the hopes that I’d be able to make a mod that actually summons a dragon of my own creation. When that all failed, I ended up looking through mods in the hopes that someone had made a dragon follower mod that actually worked. When I came up short, I decided just to use my summoned dragons mod that I made ages ago. But then I decided I wanted to summon Durnehviir, the undead dragon who lives in the Soul Cairn. That all meant playing Dawnguard again. On my Dragon character. Aside from the… [Continue Reading]

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Dawnguard Snipin’ – Part 7

Well, my fellow mercs, I didn’t think we’d get this far. Last time round, I fought a vampire to get a shiny bow. Serana complained it wasn’t very shiny, but she’s a whinging brat. Anyway, my legs are knackered. I had to stop by in Medic’s place and dump all the loot I had stol- um, liberated from that snow elf church, and Serana and I are back at Fort Dawnguard to rally the troops and all that crap. It’s a pretty big place. Like Demo’s place but way nicer. Sorry Tavish. Isran, the guy who hired me, is standing… [Continue Reading]

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Dawnguard Snipin’ – Part 6

You know what mate? I’m getting kinda tired of walking. When Medic got back from Skyrim, he told me that there was tons of walking, but it was actually eventful. This is all just tedious! I spent all of last time walking, hope this time perks up. So after killing those two winged bastards, things start to get a bit tight and valley-y. I ain’t got a clue who you get onto those bridges up there (or even how they were built, these ugly Falmer aren’t exactly smart), but eventually we get to a place called Glacial Crevice. We head… [Continue Reading]

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Dawnguard Snipin’ – Part 5

Ya know what, mate? This is gonna be a long trip, I can feel it. Longer than even last time maybe. But now I’ve read those stupid scrolls, we know where we’re going for a change. As we walk, stupid vampire girl and I stumble across a dragon nest. Been here before, but this time, something was different… I ain’t got no idea what’s happened here. That’s a dragon. Apparently. I ain’t got a clue, mate. We back away slowly from that horrible thing and continue walking towards our destination. It’s some cave on the edge of the country. Lots… [Continue Reading]

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Dawnguard Snipin’ – Part 2

Ah, you’re all back. Thought I’d lost you all back there. Well, after some fun with Merasmus, I’m in Skyrim. This vampire thing called Lord Harkon just gave me a choice to become a giant monster and work for him, or go home. Look how demanding this wanka is. Look at him. Wanka. I don’t think I want to work for him, so he…  Wow, that bloody fruitshop owner just kicked me out of his damn castle. Not even a bloody reward. Ya hear that, kids? Don’t trust those vampires. Cheap bastards. So I’m going to have to walk all… [Continue Reading]

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Sniper in Skyrim – Dawnguard Snipin’ Part 1

G’day, mates! Sniper here! I heard that stupid traitorous quack was entering alternate universes and saving them, so I decided to get in on the action! I ain’t letting that wanka take all the glory. So I hopped on to one of Engineer’s teleporters and decided to go to this Skyrim place myself! And unlike Medic, I’m going to actually stay in character. Stupid doctor. Merasmus has left me with some magic and something he called “Thu’um”. No idea what that is, guess I’ll find out later. Ain’t got nothing but my weapons (Sniper Rifle, SMG, Kukri, Huntsman) and a… [Continue Reading]

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