Disney’s Jungle Cruise: The Real-Life Conquistadors Behind the Villains

So I just watched Jungle Cruise, the newest adventure movie released by Disney and starring Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson. It was a good popcorn flick, fun for the whole family etc. I was intrigued by its use of historical figures in the villainous roles. I guess everything below this line is technically spoilers, though they’re pretty tame in the grand scheme of things. The two main villains (Prince Joachim of Prussia and Lope de Aguirre, the 15th century conquistador) are both real people taken straight from the history books. And most of the internet has already discussed how thoroughly-fictionalized these… [Continue Reading]

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A plea for the Sharpened Volcano Fragment

The Jungle Inferno update is here. Many rejoiced at the Bottle, Scottish Handshake and Neon Annihilator now breaking on critical hits, or the Righteous Bison and Claidheamh Mòr being restored to their former glory. Meanwhile, I looked through everything, and has yet to find what I hoped to see: a buff for the Sharpened Volcano Fragment. Is it foolish for me to expect a buff for it? Its stats has been the same since it first appeared, and it was just as bad back then as it is now. And this is supposed to be the update that breathes new life into… [Continue Reading]

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HOLY FUCKING BAHRAG AN ACTUAL TF2 UPDATE

I knew this would happen. Just as I’m getting my teeth into an update for one of my favourite games, my other favourite games all get updates and news as well. In this case, while the Plains of Eidolon came out on Thursday 12th, here we are not even a week later with Jungle Inferno, that update we’ve been waiting for. After more than a fucking year. And amazingly, it’s a multi-day update. Something we haven’t seen properly since the Uber Update. Which was back in 2014… no… 2013? Er… A really fucking long time ago. I suppose that’s what… [Continue Reading]

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