Not So Great Expectations

The other night, I watched a film called I, Frankenstein. It was a very silly film, not in an intended comedic sense but in a way where people who review films will just sigh and point out every single bad bit until they get bored and start talking about how Slumdog Millionaire changed the world or whatever. Nonetheless, despite its bad reviews, I sat down and watched it and I quite enjoyed it. Alright, the film was nothing special, the plot was basically Van Helsing, Dogma, Dracula, John Dies At The End and every other similar god-monster-demon-related film put together,… [Continue Reading]

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Arena_Granary and why I hate it despite liking its counterparts

Everyone loves Granary, right? No? Oh. Some people love Granary, right? Either way, it’s a favourite for the competitive players out there, as it’s got lots of high and low ground, it’s not too hard to defend and other stuff which I don’t really get. But back in the day, there was also Arena_Granary. Like a couple of other maps, particularly Badlands, Granary was converted into an arena map for the release, of, well, Arena mode. Of course, Arena mode never really got going. People got frustrated with waiting forever to respawn, especially if there was a Spy hiding with… [Continue Reading]

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Poor Unloved TFC Pyro

So what if every weapon in Pyro’s arsenal is rubbish. So what if TFC afterburn deals 2 ticks of damage for 4 ticks, a grand total of EIGHT damage before extinguishing itself. So what if napalm grenades are the only explosive grenades in TFC with lower damage output than regular hand grenades. You know what the pyro has that nobody else has? Personality. TFC Pyro is the only class in the game with idle animations! Occasionally, he’ll sweep his hand lovingly across the top of his flamethrower, or fiddle with the sighting reticule of his Incendiary cannon. He clearly loves… [Continue Reading]

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A Plea From a Broken Sword

To the Developers of Team Fortress 2 and the player fanbase. Hello. As a figurehead in the Demoknight community (Yes, that’s a thing), I have been vetted by a few other Knight enthusiasts to make an official statement on the status which is our beloved demoknight. It appears the community has gotten mixed responses from the backlash of the changes to the Chargin’ Targe turning bypass involving a joystick. Probably leaning towards positive since our methods of execution were nothing short of exploiting. For a lot of people it was a cheap way to get a kill, the next best… [Continue Reading]

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OhGodPleaseNotBadwaterAgainPleaseNooooo!

Yes, that title is like that on purpose, because that is how I feel when I see Badwater pop up as the next map. I still think that when I see Badwater_Rainy pop up, but not quite as much, as I need to take a few seconds to rebind my swim up and swim down keys. Where does this hatred, where does this fear come from? Well, read on, I’m about to tell you. In my early days of Team Fortress 2, I quickly realized that Teufort is a bad map. I wasn’t so quick to work out that Junction… [Continue Reading]

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The Badlands aren’t that bad…

In previous articles, I’ve whinged and moaned about how I don’t like particular maps, while aabicus has gone on about how much he loves Doomsday and others still have tried to talk about other maps still. Today is about a map, yes, but this time, I’m not whinging. Well, not completely. Badlands is considered one of the best maps around. It is by far one of the most loved maps for competitive play, as each area has its own weaknesses and strengths, much like our favourite mercenaries. The map comes in three lovely flavours, although two of them are very… [Continue Reading]

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Getting Lost in Steel

Steel is one of those maps that has a hit and miss effect on the community. A lot of people really like Steel and wish it could be played on more servers. Others utterly hate the map and refuse to play on it. Personally, I’m not sure, but I find myself veering towards disliking it. Let’s start with the good stuff. Steel is a very nice-looking map, set in that Dustbowl-like environment, dry with a hint of vegetation, some grass, but with lots of indoor areas and quite a few tight corners, more like Turbine. Both types of environment look… [Continue Reading]

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A Tale of Two Communities

Lately, SPUF has gotten a bit cabin-feverish, and I can’t say I blame them. The anger seems to be directed at Valve’s repeated promises of “great stuff on the horizon!” and the actuality of the extreme drought of new content for TF2. Recently, even the throwaway crap such as blog posts, cosmetics, and localization-file-only updates have dried up. I can understand why SPUF is upset. But I disagree with how a large amount of this anger seems to be directed at Dota 2, Valve’s newest cash cow and spearhead of the MOBA genre that is clearly getting the lion’s share… [Continue Reading]

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“Oh god, not Gullywash…”

I don’t know why, but I hate Gullywash. Every time I see it pop up in the map rotation, I roll my eyes. I roll my eyes even more if there’s more than 7 players per team and this map comes up. Actually, I do know why and I’m about to tell you in a moment. Let’s clarify something first. I like 5cp, or symmetrical control points or whatever you want to call it. It’s a lovely back and forth game mode, and most 5cp maps are nicely balanced to make sure you can’t camp on the last point forever,… [Continue Reading]

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