We’ve been getting new weapons all along!

The other day, aabicus mentioned that a weapon (the Persian Persuader to be precise) had essentially been removed from the game. While it hadn’t really been removed, the stats that make the Persian Persuader the Persian Persuader had been changed completely, making it a pretty mediocre weapon in the process. But as everyone screamed in realization as one of Demoman’s more interesting and niche melees had disappeared, something else occurred to me. We’ve been getting new weapons all along! The Persian Persuader is one of many of these new weapons. Alright, it doesn’t have the excitement of getting a new… [Continue Reading]

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On Pre-Match Paralysis

The Pre-Match freeze is something that every TF2 player has experienced, something that you encounter every single match you play, and something that’s been in the game from the very beginning. And yet I think it may be one of the least-discussed facets of the game. I know I thought about making an article on it twice in the past two years and both times abandoned the notion due to lack of content. Why does it happen? When I first wondered about it, I wasn’t even sure if it was intentional. Maybe the map’s loading, or something in the background has… [Continue Reading]

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Why Does Valve Keep Buffing Medic?

Do not buff Medic! No, seriously, don’t. That seems like an insane thing to say, considering I’ve been calling myself Medic, The Medic, BLU Medic and many other variations of the word for the past three or four years now, not to mention the fact that out of my 1700 hours of TF2, about 900 of them are as Medic. But hear me out for a moment. Medic is the most powerful class in the game. No one else has the pushing power capable of taking down sentries harmlessly. No one can stand in the way of an Ubercharged power… [Continue Reading]

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Less Sure About Gun Mettle Changes as Time Goes On

I’ve never exactly had a positive relationship with the new CSGO-style weapon skins in TF2, but at best my opinion was neutral. They weren’t exactly hurting anything, and they were strictly cosmetic. I also supported the new weapon pickup mechanic, as I describe in this article. But as I play more TF2, mainly because my Christmas desktop is badass enough to allow me to do so on high settings, I’m finding that both of these mechanics are annoying me far more than they’re endearing themselves. The new skins are really bothering my weapon recognition. Now, at the moment you can… [Continue Reading]

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The Only Weapon Removed From TF2

I know I already wrote an article on this, but the Persian Persuader has become the first weapon removed from Team Fortress 2. I’ve searched my memory banks and the TF2 Wiki and I’m almost positive the Tough Break Persian Persuader is the first weapon ever to have every single one of its stats removed and replaced with new ones. (I’m not counting the generic sword stats that every bladed Demoknight melee shares, those are inherent in the classification.) For comparison, we went from this: +100% increase in charge recharge rate All ammo collected becomes health Cannot pick up ammo To… [Continue Reading]

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The New Vaccinator

During Tough Break, Valve reworked the Vaccinator again. As a Medic main, I felt it was my duty to try the thing out so I can see for myself if the poor thing has finally reached the lofty echelons of the other mediguns, or if it still sucked. I first tried it out on King of The Hill, a game mode that lets me quickly switch from offense to defense. I found that it served its job decently well in both categories. If I were taking on a single enemy with my pocket, I could easily switch to the correct… [Continue Reading]

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Five reasons why I’m not pre-ordering Overwatch

Everyone’s going on about Overwatch. Me? I’m pissed off. Mostly because I missed the open-to-all Beta weekend, because that was the one weekend I didn’t have stable internet. Typical. Still, I’ve been watching Overwatch and I do really like the look of it, and I think Valve will have to step up their game if they want TF2 to be able to keep up. That being said, I won’t be pre-ordering the game any time soon. Here’s why. 5. I don’t feel as if it’s worth $30 right now. Overwatch being a mostly multiplayer game is good and all, but… [Continue Reading]

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Here’s to 2015

It hasn’t been a great year for Team Fortress 2. Not a bad year either, but definitely not a great year. Not even a good one, to be honest. And with SPUF currently not working very well, I’m not exactly a happy little Medic. Actually, I’m a sad little Medic who’s considering going and getting a beer right now. I don’t even drink. I have hated 2015, for many reasons. But this article’s about 2015 and TF2, not my life. The first half of the year was devoid of life. Nothing at all of interest happened until half way through… [Continue Reading]

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When you thought the Phlog couldn’t get any worse…

I’m actually surprised the last few days. People thought the Phlogistinator was horribad at the start of the Tough Break update but it seems like everyone’s just rolling over and accepting the changes! And if you’re not accepting the ludicrous changes that happened to the Phlogistinator, then you’re clearly some sort of fucking retard who should learn to play. While I generally feel like a retard when playing TF2 anyway (because I am undeniably shit at this game), you don’t need to be particularly smart to see that the Phlog changes were unneeded. For those of you who haven’t seen… [Continue Reading]

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On Performance Enhancing Stuff

On December 2nd, there was a patch. In that patch came things to do with forcing people to use DX9 or higher for competitive matchmaking. This made me very angry. I am now going to proceed by complaining about this. DX 8 does lack some of the features that DX 9 has. You don’t get outlines around Payload carts and around whoever’s carrying the intelligence. You miss out on various cosmetic effects. Some things glitch out and have a strange fire texture on them instead of their normal textures, which looks awesome on Pyro cosmetics but shit on other things.… [Continue Reading]

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