TF2’s Unlock System is Truly Unique

Can we take a moment just to explore how revolutionary TF2’s unlock design is? Think back to the days before the Gold Rush Update. TF2 was a complex and nuanced game, with 9 classes and 25 weapons, and then Valve announces that there will be unlockable weapons added, starting with the Medic class. What would you predict these weapons will be like? Taking the standard dev theme for designing alternate weapons for a slot, probably something like this: I’m running through a list in my head of shooters with swappable inventory unlocks, and I’m seeing a very tedious trend where the closest thing to… [Continue Reading]

Read more

Stupidly Simple Changes – Quality of Life Fixes Edition

Originally, I was going to call this article “A bunch of fixes for weapons that totally don’t need it”, but two problems cropped up. Firstly, it’s a stupid idea, no one wants to read about purposefully overpowered weapons, secondly the idea kinda fell flat on its face because there was too much to talk about and thirdly, it’s just dumb. So why not turn to fixes that we could actually do with. You know, like those two Stupidly Simple Fixes articles I did. You know, this one and this one. A Quality of Life fix is basically what the Spy’s… [Continue Reading]

Read more

The Hammer of Change draws closer…

Greetings citizens. I come to you with glum news. It seems as though the Riot Summoners have chosen me to be sacrificed to the Lords of Balance. The Hammer of Change is near, hovering above me dangerously, with a hideous squint in its bearer’s eyes. Yes, you heard me correctly, I am about to be nerfed into the ground. Or possibly not. You see, Riot has no idea what to do with one of the faces of League of Legends. As I stand, I am a glorious tank. I will soak up all the damage, spin around a bit, make… [Continue Reading]

Read more

Calm down, dear!

” Go free. Get clean.” – Confusion, 2015 Or not. That quote is actually from me ending a conversation with him because I needed to shower. Then again, in this weather, you can shower every hour and still find yourself stinking of sweat, that’s how hot it is for me currently. Hot weather, particularly heatwaves, make one stressed. As do video games. That line actually fits quite well with this article. It’s genuinely surprising how annoyed I get at video games, even when my team wins. I’m calmer now though. What’s even more surprising is how annoyed people get while discussing… [Continue Reading]

Read more

Salvaging an idea – The Uber-Syringe Gun

There’s always been several ideas that are tossed around the Medic sub-forum of SPUF. The Overhealer, a Medi Gun that makes you invisible, Vita-Saw reworks, all sorts. One of these ideas is a Syringe Gun or other primary weapon that works alongside the Ubersaw. On hit, you get Ubercharge. But nine times out of ten, the suggested ideas just don’t pan out. I believe otherwise. I think the idea of an Uber Syringe Gun could be made to work. But it quickly becomes a bit complicated. Our first step is to see what problems such a weapon would create. Ubercharge… [Continue Reading]

Read more

Why I’m Not Bothered By The New Medigun-Dropping Mechanic

The reaction to the new Gun Mettle Update has been refreshingly positive. Sure, a lot of people think the new skins look stupid and dislike how they’re blatantly ripped from another game, but the day I lose sleep over a cosmetic mini-game is the day I re-evaluate my life. The part of the update that mattered was all those delicious weapon tweaks. Pretty much every commonly-complained about weapon got hit with at least a minor adjustment, and a few new weapons are now seeing use in new and unheard-of ways. Two other points of contention involve what this contract system… [Continue Reading]

Read more

The Scotsman’s New Skullcutter

On Smissmas 2014 Valve made my dream come true. The Scotsman’s Skullcutter became elevated from the dregs of poorly-optimized demoknights and Trolldemos to one of the best melee weapons for Demomen who treat their melee weapon like an emergency weapon instead of an intergral part of their loadout. Is it overpowered? Maybe. That’s a hard statement to make, what with the state of Demoman’s melee at the moment. The Ullapool Caber and Half-Zatoichi are pretty kickass weapons that fill the same role after all. And while the Skullcutter lacks the crippling downsides inherent in those two weapons, it also doesn’t bring anything new… [Continue Reading]

Read more

The Light Machine Gun Plight

LMGs have always been a misunderstood and under-appreciated weapon genre in first-person shooters. Whereas mechanically they fill an obvious role in the sniper rifle>assault rifle>machine gun progression tree, in practice they’re often left off the list entirely or locked into specialist roles due to lack of developer support. Mechanically, LMGs focuses on spewing huge magazines of high-damage bullets very inaccurately. In theory its wielder assumes a suppressive fire role, ensuring that somebody is still firing while all the more-accurate teammates are reloading. Unfortunately its often the case that devs shoulder the LMG with a whole host of downsides; I can… [Continue Reading]

Read more

TF2vOW: Scout versus Tracer

Welcome to the first-ever edition of the “TEAM FORTRESS 2 VERSUS OVERWATCH” series.  Inspired by the ongoing flamewars between the two fandoms and Screwattacks own “Death Battle” series on Youtube, TF2 vs OW is where I theoretically pit one or more of your favorite TF2 classes against their counterparts from Blizzard’s upcoming TF2 rip-off (and revenge for Valve stealing DOTA): Overwatch! We’re probably never going to be able to see this in this reality, so doing it here will be the next best thing!  I will try to go through each characters weapons and abilities as objectively as possible in order to decide who would win… [Continue Reading]

Read more

GEOFF, NOOOOOO!

GEOFF! NO, WHAT HAPPENED? SPEAK TO ME, GEOFF, SPEAK TO ME! KEEP YOUR EYES ON ME, GEOFF! WE’RE LOSING HIM! HE’S FLATLINING… We’ve lost him. If you don’t know what I’m talking about, I’m referring to the Vaccinator. The Fourth Medi Gun. The one that is now dead. I know Medi Guns can’t die, as they’re not alive*, but the Vaccinator has been driven into complete uselessness. Okay, the original Vaccinator, when it was released, wasn’t exactly helpful. It charged incredibly fast, but because critical resistances weren’t factored into the three resistance types as a whole, it didn’t see much… [Continue Reading]

Read more