Home on the Range

Shooters. The genre where you murder the other guy before he murders you. And what better way to train yourself for the horrifying prospect of a life or death showdown with another cold, calculated, killer (like yourself) than showing some wooden targets who’s boss? Oh, okay! Well if you’re going to be all fussy about it, YES! There’s slightly more that goes into it than hitting your desired target, something about the “horrors of war” or something? But I’ll have you know those wooden targets can be a pretty fierce bunch too and they pop up all over the place!… [Continue Reading]

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Escaping the Stalker

Volt hated Spy missions. He hated them with a passion. Not because Volt couldn’t hack, in fact, Volt had mastered hacking pretty quickly. He didn’t mind the sneaking either, he actively enjoyed being sneaky at times. No, Volt hated Spy missions because of all those stupid energy fields and sensors and cameras and stuff that the Grineer and Corpus always chucked around their stupid vaults. Why couldn’t they just be in rooms with locked doors that needed to be hacked, rather than stupid jumping puzzles that required Volt to stop running, slow down and start doing stupid backflips and stuff… [Continue Reading]

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On Sounding Like an Idiot while Explaining Things

So the other day, I helped aabicus complete Vor’s Prize, the tutorial quest of Warframe. We played for about three hours, getting aabicus to Mastery Rank 1 and unlocking Venus as a place he can visit. From what I heard, aabicus enjoyed himself, and as I thought, he very much liked the game’s mobility, accessible to all Warframes no matter what you use. But as I slowly explained everything, I realised how 1. I had never noticed some things and 2. I sounded like an idiot when I thought about what I had just said. On the not-noticing side of… [Continue Reading]

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Widowmaker Vs. TFClassic Sniper: Who Would Win?

So I was talking with a friend about hypothetical cross-franchise class matchups, in the vein of Scout vs Tracer, Medic vs Sona, Engineer vs Nuparu, Heavy vs Braum, and Pyro vs Toa Vakama. It’s a pretty popular concept on our blog and I realized we hadn’t covered one of the most obvious, that of TF2’s favorite Kiwi versus Overwatch‘s favorite cheesecake. But after ruminating on the idea, I had trouble even starting due to the nature of TF2 Sniper’s unlocks. Do I treat TF2 Sniper as his stock class (which means Widow wins easily) or as an amalgamation of his unlocks, which turns him into a horrifying combination… [Continue Reading]

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Lowglow

After a run of bad multiplayer matches in several games on my PS4, I looked for a calm, stress-reliever type game… Which is when I realised I didn’t actually have one. My friends I’d played with had all jumped on Stardew Valley, understandably, considering it’s so soothing and addicting that it borders on being illegal. Meanwhile, the closest thing to that for me was Darkest Dungeon simply due to it being turn-based. Don’t let that name trick you though. Staggeringly, it isn’t about gentle strolls through meadows filled with fluffy creatures. But on STEAM, I found this dusty, uninstalled gem.… [Continue Reading]

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I Move Like They Do

Okay, okay, enough with the references. But seriously, this game is awesome. It’s amazing how even with the entire world in slow motion, the gameplay still feels as frantic as it does. Bursts of speed combined with the agonizingly slow-moving bullets makes for a teeth-grittingly tense shooter. But it kinda plays like a puzzle game as well, as you’re always trying to stay one step ahead at the very least. It’s strangely methodical in its gameplay. Superhot. The game where “time only moves when you do”-ish. Time actually does move if you stand still or move your mouse, just so… [Continue Reading]

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Team Fortress Comics #6 is out!

It’s only been forever (okay, nearly a year and a half) since the last issue, but woo boy, this one is a biggie! And by biggie, I mean it both in actual size and in content. Issue 6 comes in at a lovely 270-something individual panels and a LOT of new lore, as well as an ending that makes you want more but also makes you willing to wait for two and three quarter years for issue 7. Before we start, be warned, there are spoilers ahead. Although this is just an overview, so I won’t be discussing every detail… [Continue Reading]

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Refunct

Refunct is, by design, simple. Astonishingly so. But that’s all it needs to be in order to be fun. It’s a first-person 3D platformer at its most pure. The objective of the game? Colour everything in and bring the world to life. It’s a giant blank colouring book you can freerun in. What’s not to love? The red beacon leads to a big red button, which when you step on it, reveals more white squares and another button… And another button… And another- But the game is happy to let you loose in the world and let you go where… [Continue Reading]

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Absolutely Drawful

I’ve always considered myself somewhat good at art. I can draw a stick figure, at least. I can also draw lots of other things if I put my mind to it, and really, the only things that hold me back are the fact that I only ever seem to draw on shitty paper with a biro and my own self loathing. Being good at drawing runs in the family… apart from my poor dad, who can’t really draw a stick figure. But none of that matters. Not when Drawful is around! Drawful is a game featured in the Jackbox Party… [Continue Reading]

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Spy’s Alcove

Spy tutted as he flicked through Mannly Hats Quarterly. It was a Smissmas special edition issue, but it was the same old common nonsense. Ugly, crumpled top hats, ugly, stupid bandannas, ugly, horrific hats made out of scrap metal, ugly, pointless banana hats… Worse, half of this edition consisted of ugly Smissmas decorations. All tasteless and poor and pathetic. Throwing the magazine down, Spy decided to get himself a drink. He had half a bottle of fine red wine, stashed away in a hidden compartment of the chair he was sitting in. There were little hidden compartments everywhere, all containing… [Continue Reading]

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