Advanced Options – Some tips before you press the big Play Multiplayer button

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Now, before we continue, I have written an article about newbie tips before, but the tips were slightly more generic. This just covers the Advanced Options menu, which many people seem to overlook. Weirdly, it’s actually easier to use than the normal Options menu, but contains TF2-specific options. The newbie really does struggle when it comes to Team Fortress 2. While it looks like a standard first person shooter at first glance (ignoring the cartoony art style), it doesn’t exactly play like one. There’s lots of tiny hints and tricks you should know before you even click the big Play… [Continue Reading]

The Art of Taunt Killing

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I love taunt kills. So weird and wonderful, and yet, almost completely useless. But performing a successful execution is beautiful. It’s the embodiment of satisfaction, tension and humiliation wrapped up in a bow, and all you have to do is deliver the present to the person of your choice. It’s one of many ways TF2 sets itself apart from the tedious, generic shooter. I like the applications for it as well. Going for the oblivious Sniper who doesn’t have situational awareness, praying for a cheeky kill at the end of a lost round, hoping for the lucky kill if you’re… [Continue Reading]

Decorating ourselves in other ways

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Clearly, we’re running out of ideas. For a game about identical mercenaries shooting each other and capturing objectives by standing on them, we have a LOT of ways of making ourselves different, as much as all those lime green Fast Learner Scouts will protest. It’s all over the place, but Valve want to make money (since they’re a business and all that and kinda need to make money) so they need yet more ways to get us to stick around and eventually buy things we don’t need. Weapons are one thing, but Valve isn’t stupid enough to make us buy… [Continue Reading]

How to Get Your Friends to Play Undertale

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“I’m sorry, why have ALL my friends begged me to play Undertale? I’ve played up to the Comic Sans jokes and I cannot stand all the false choice so far. NPC: Don’t progress further! I’m protecting you from the world for your own good! Go back to bed! “Do you wanna fight, talk, or flee from the friendly cow?” aabicus: Uhh, talk “You cant think of anything to talk about” aabicus: okay, flee? “you flee. it’s still in the way of the rest of the game” aabicus: I guess turn around and go back to bed “The narrator shouts at… [Continue Reading]

On Upvotes and Downvotes

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At 1am the other day, I got into an argument with someone online, in a video game forum. Someone had made a post saying they had cancer. Whether that was true or not, no one knows, but someone in that thread was advocating not seeing a doctor and treating cancer with orange juice and turmeric. Of course, this set off my angry button as someone who goes around calling himself Medic. I replied to this insane person, saying that, whether the person really had cancer or otherwise, their suggestion of unproven food fads was fucking retarded, they should have been… [Continue Reading]

The Gentleman’s Gatsby

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“I was wondering around the other day, using my spectacularly riotous tickle mittens to coax my fellow adversely-colored brethren into fits of eye-watering hilarity, when a kind fellow noted the bubbly intrigue of my fine trusty battle helmet I had acquired from a rather loaded fellow whose name I do not recall, his name began with “Fus” or something of the like. But anyhow the man was bewildered. “Where do those bubbles come from?! What kinds of sorcery is at play?” he asked, as he consumed a particularly large fishcake. “Well…” I replied in haste. “This is an unusual hat.… [Continue Reading]

The Righteous Pomson

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I’d been meaning to talk about this for a while, but back when Tough Break came out, there was an unintended side effect caused by the Flamethrower tweaks, and it doesn’t even refer to the Pyro. Tough Break’s patch notes mentioned that “The base Flamethrower’s damage fall off over distance has been decreased, resulting in higher damage output at range” and I could write a whole article about how all of these stock flamethrower buffs have elevated the weapon back to a surprising level of viability. But this affected more than just the flamethrowers; the Righteous Bison and Pomson 6000 mimic ‘lasers’… [Continue Reading]

Medic’s First Tiny Steps into Official TF2 Competitive

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This article was brought to you by Puffs, the Number 1 Medic-Calmer. Puffs – pink, round, puffy and opinionated, get yours now! Alright, a million years later than everyone else, I’ve finally had a go at TF2 matchmaking, during the 6th Stress Test. (Note: this article is a bit late – I held off publishing it due to a week of love and hate) I was finally around when that delightful Stress Test button appeared on my screen, and I was actually in a good enough mood to play. But, coward that I am, I didn’t want to go it… [Continue Reading]

MeeM’s thoughts on Personality

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Recently, it dawned on me that I had some name tags lying around but no names to give to my weapons and, in true SPUF style I felt the need to tell others. Now this was all well and good but something else was pointed out to me. A few weeks before the introduction of escrow I had wanted to S. F. Crusader’s. Of course, nobody seems to have the one thing you need and I was in a terrible rush to avoid the delay. Because of this, I got a renamed/redesced crossbow for a bad price. No matter, I… [Continue Reading]

Consternation and Conversation

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When reading through Medic’s summary of the community event ‘A Week of Love and Hate 2’ the last thing I expected to see was my own name being congratulated at the end of it, as well as the promise of a random game and an article about me of all things. I’d only ever entered for the hell of it, as I figured it might be fun tackling the topic of Sniper from both sides considering I love to play as him, but I’m not blind to his dodgy secondary designs nor the fact that he’s a strictly love/hate class… [Continue Reading]