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On The Direct Hit

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"Dodge this!"
“Dodge this!”

The Direct Hit can either be the most devastating single-shot rocket launcher unlock or the worst rocket launcher to ever disgrace the battlefield if you can’t place your shots right and want to rely on splash damage. As a Soldier-main who’s retired his first strange Direct Hit for the easier stock rocket launcher after reaching a few hundred kills past Epic Rank, I too can agree that it’s a troublesome weapon to many who don’t know the nature behind using the Direct Hit. But mastering this pesky launcher can pull off some both quantitative and hilarious outcomes.

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Some Tips for TF2 If You’ve Never Played An FPS Before…

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The first First Person Shooter (FPS) I played was Left 4 Dead. But because my computer then was a steaming pile of crap, it took me literally 45 minutes with a frame rate of under 10 frames per second (also FPS) to inch my way across the first level of No Mercy. Amazingly, I did it first time, but I made it to the safe room with a miserable 10 health.

It took a very long time for me to get a good computer and properly understand what it was like to move around in a First Person Shooter. My early adventures in Left 4 Dead just did not compare to what it was truly like. Then again, Garry’s Mod isn’t the best example of a First Person Shooter either. Team Fortress 2 though was still out of the question, as explosions would cause my computer to die…

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E is for MEDIC!

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I think that Medic is trying to tell him something... Picture by Medic
I think that Medic is trying to tell him something… Picture by Medic

Yes, E is for Medic. Okay, fair enough, it’s also for Engineer and everything else beginning with E, but I’m not talking about what words start with. I’m talking about the default key that the Medic! call is bound to. Some people bind the Medic! call to other buttons, but most people I have spoken to leave it as E. It’s close, it’s handy, it’s easy to spam.

It’s also the bane of all Medics.

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Heavy Picnics and Other Amusing Mini-Games

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Friendly Heavies...
Friendly Heavies…

Most people seem to hate friendly Heavies. You know, those Heavies who wander around maps, Sandvich in hand, not actually doing any killing. Free points if they’re on the enemy team, a waste of a slot if they’re on yours. But when everyone on a server is being a friendly Heavy, that means they can be easily swayed by your will. And your voice, particularly if you have one of those deep, gentlemannly, British voices or happen to be obviously female.

But now we have a server full of willing players under our command, what can we do with them? Play games with them, of course!

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They See Me Snipin’, They Hatin’…

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Picture by Medic.
Does this seem familiar? Picture by Medic.

Let’s face it. We hate Snipers. In every single Remove A Class thread on SPUF, the class that gets picked on the most is the Sniper. Despite his loud-mouthed insults, his only-just Australian accent and his ability to throw jars of urine around, people still despise the poor guy. It’s not his fault though, it’s just the way he was designed!

The question is, why does everyone hate Sniper? Is it his bad accent? His lack of Mannliness? Finding five of them on a team of twelve? All those jars of urine? The Bushwacka? Not quite.

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On the Fists of Steel

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My fists are made of steel, and so is the rest of me!
My fists are made of steel, and so is the rest of me! Picture by A Dapper Apple

The Fists of Steel are a melee weapon for Heavy that, while active, grants damage resistance to all ranged weapons, but also take double damage from melee damage.  Because they are not the GRU, they are often overlooked.  However, I find the FoS to have at least a few interesting uses as well as a decent melee weapon, especially with a more shotgun/boxing strategy.

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I ought to write something about the Heavy Weapons Guy…

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Heavies love to eat, but they can sure hate sharing...
At least this Medic isn’t on fire…

I OUGHT to write something about Heavy. I really ought to. I mean, I’m Medic. If we go by stereotypes, I’m supposed to be attached to a Heavy all day, every day. I’m not though, because I value being a skilled healer with a hint of reputation.

The Heavy Weapons Guy though is the face of Team Fortress 2. He embodies the soul of the damn game. Silly and childish yet dangerous and deadly at the same time. Even more so when you run around a corner only to walk into a spun-up Heavy or find yourself in the middle of a Heavy Boxing Match. Okay, the latter isn’t very common, but it does happen…

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Curse of Sudden Death! Arena!

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There's no respawning in Arena Mode, so don't die!
There’s no respawning in Arena Mode, so don’t die!

Arena is a gamemode that came long ago to TF2, back in times of Heavy Update that introduced the horribly broken Natasha (back then it was, it so was…), underpowered sandwich and KGB that no one wanted to put aside for simple fists. The times changed as did the weapons, and so changed Arena.

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Gunslingers Vs Highlanders! Season 3 Results

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Gunslingers VS Highlanders, winners all round... Picture by Medic
Gunslingers VS Highlanders, winners all round… Picture by Medic

In previous Seasons, (Season 1 Season 2) the Gunslingers and Highlanders  have duked it out in an all-out war against which side would win. In Season 1, Highlanders won. In Season 2, Gunslingers won. Season 3 would be the tiebreaker as to which side would pull ahead over the other teams.

However, there’s a twist this Season. On July 10th, the Gunslinger was nerfed! It no longer regens while it builds! Can this cost the Gunslingers a win? Let’s see the results then!

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Why you really, really should not be a Battle Medic.

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Picture by The Medic
Picture by The Medic

For everyone who plays Team Fortress 2 and is at least not a potato, it’s clear as day why Battle Medics are never a good idea. Although Medics have that little speed boost and regenerating health, their weaponry simply isn’t built for fighting. This, on top of a lack of heavy-class health and no true, reliable advanced mobility, is a recipe for disaster. Plus, it annoys your team mates, who are probably on fire right now.

But just how bad is a Medic’s weaponry when it comes to fighting? Let’s start with the basics. We’ll concentrate on primary weapons, because Medi Guns obviously can’t do damage, and melee weapons are, well, melee weapons. Only Demoknights and Pyros can really pull off melee-only combat, and even then, that’s due to unlocks. We’ll look at this by pitting an imaginary Battle Medic against the average Scout.

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