Some Quick Fixes To Make The MvM Experience More Fun

Ever since the Two Cities Update, the face of Mann Versus Machine has been invariably altered. With the obscene buffs the Medic and Soldier received from this update (I’ll complain less about the Medic, because he really needed some love, and now he’s basically indispensable), MvM, for some, has come to an irritating middle-ground, where the older missions, namely Operation Steel Trap (and, to some extent, Gear Grinder. Yeah, remember them? Me neither) have become laughably easy, or something you run through with your friends as six Demoknights for a chuckle, and the newest missions are hair-pullingly difficult. To me, and hopefully at least one of you, this is bogus.

 

"Ahaha! He thinks he can plant the bomb!" "Dude, that's enough. He's only Intermediate, after all."
“Ahaha! He thinks he can plant the bomb!” “Dude, that’s enough. He’s only Intermediate, after all.” Picture by Noble Atomic.

As someone who has sunk a considerable part of their TF2 experience into MvM, I remember the soul-crushing agony of trying to find a match on the night the update dropped, those encounters with blokes who had been on the same Expert Mission server for three hours trying to find a winning team, being a bloke who has been on the same Expert Mission server for three hours, and screaming in unison with the Announcer when an Engineer bot showed up (more on them later). And now, after slaving away at Empire Escalation for as many hours as I once had at Mannslaughter, I realized that, with all these updates to the Medic and Soldier, going back to those missions and still expecting a challenge would be impossible.

That being said, there are things that are positively infuriating about the way MvM currently works that could also make the experience more enjoyable. So, I’m going to propose some changes Valve could make to the way MvM works in order to keep MvM (all MvM) exciting for players at all levels, as well as improve the experience over all.

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SPUF-A Cast #1 Submissions Open!

Heads up! Today marks the start of the submission period for SPUF Anthology Cast 1! The deadlines for submissions is the Sunday after next, November 26th! As a part of our inaugural cast, there will be a special reward for anyone included in this cast, so get those submissions in! I am also cooking up a few new special segments, stay tuned on the SPUF thread and steam group later for details on those. (Also, looking for a better acronym/name. Any ideas?)

The Crusader’s Crossbow is now the least viable Medic primary

What Valve giveth, Valve can taketh away.
What Valve giveth, Valve can taketh away.

After a mere 48 hours of giving us the perfect Crusader’s Crossbow, Valve followed up by nerfing it’s damage by 33%. As someone who has spent hundreds of hours perfecting my skill with this weapon, and considers it my favorite weapon in TF2, let me say that the weapon is now useless.

Let me rehash the same reasons I enjoyed the previous crossbow and show how none of them apply any more.

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Five Things I Miss From Team Fortress Classic

I loved Team Fortress Classic. While I won’t argue it was more balanced than TF2, or even better then TF2, since I consider the two so different as to be incomparable, I loved it for what it was. It was Team Fortress boiled down to its core: Two teams of dudes shooting each other and working together to fill their teammate’s inherent weaknesses. No cartoony graphics, no multinational band of misfits, just nails and bullets and grenades.

And there are some things I really miss from it, things that make me turn the game on and play on bot-choked 2fort/dustbowl servers (because that’s all there is left…), just to experience it again. Things like:

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A Comparison of Scout Secondaries

If you were to ask me what I thought the most versatile weapon slot in TF2 is, I’d say Scout secondary. Unlocks in that section vary from pistols to drinkables, to throwables that either deal damage or leave status effects. (If Valve ever releases the Scout and Medic Grordbort sets, that’ll add a laser weapon to the list). Of all the classes, scout is the one I have the most different loadouts for. Most classes it’s more like “Every so often my Pain Train isn’t needed, so I equip Caber,” or “If I’m using the Quick-Fix, I might as well equip Syringe Gun over crossbow because I’m committed to mediocrity” but with Scout the whole loadout changes with the secondary. Today I’m going to go over the diverse selection of Scout secondaries and what I like to equip with them. (Including cosmetics! I always try to grab cosmetics that match the secondary for scout, mainly because the game has decided that every cosmetic that drops for aabicus must be scout-equippable.)

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Some tips on posting successful trades on TF2 Outpost

While I wouldn’t consider myself a “hardcore trader”, I certainly do it. Most TF2 players enjoy making at least one of the classes look as cool as they can afford, or grabbing strange versions of weapons they truly enjoy.

This pretty much requires using a significant amount of TF2 Outpost, which can be a great experience if you find a good trader. Unfortunately, the percentage of users who seem interested in making things fast, easy, and simple are vanishing every day. As a frequent buyer, my usual strategy is to search for something, open a bunch of tabs of online people offering a certain item, and then instantly close anyone who breaks the following rules:

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(Blog posts about Strange Parts: 1)

So I was leafing through my inventory, trying to figure out how to make loadouts using some stuff I never wear. It was when I tried to make a stat-obsessed LARPer parody using the Merasmus hat that I tried to fit as many counters onto one loadout as possible. Did you realize TF2 now has items that track stuff in every single loadout slot? Using the above loadout (along with three strange weapons, with 3 strange parts each, and a strange PDA tool), you now can track: · The number of kills on your primary weapon ···Three other random stats… [Continue Reading]

Why the Short Circuit should be allowed in Medieval Mode

Remember when I covered Medieval Mode? It’s a great mode. Really fun for eight out of 9 TF2 classes.

I’m reasonably certain you can guess which class gets shafted (and not just by arrows).

I'm not sure why Valve gives me this 200 metal. I can't use it.
I’m not sure why Valve gives me this 200 metal. I can’t use it.

Yes, poor Engineer has had everything he’s ever built stolen from him, and left to fend for himself with a plethora of melee weapons designed to augment nonexistent sentry guns. He basically shouldn’t exist as a choice, and for the most part if you play Medieval Mode, you’ll find that his representation on cp_degrootkeep is sorely lacking. (If there are engies, that’s usually a sign your server is busting out the bots).

Well, I’ve put a lot of thought into it, and decided that there is a simple fix that would go a long way towards making him fill an actual role that would improve Medieval Mode. Namely give him his Short Circuit back.

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Why I Hate the Half-Zatoichi

Let’s get this blog off on the right foot; complaining about weapon unlocks! The Half-Zatoichi is a sword for Demoman and Soldier that behaves identically to the stock bottle except for 3 things: (1) killing someone with it heals you to full health, (2) not killing someone with it makes you unable to switch back to your other weapons, and (3) people wielding the weapon can OHKO each other. First. Let’s deal with the ‘honorbound’ downside. It makes this sword very annoying to use. The number of reasons you might not get the kill is staggering; perhaps a teammate steals… [Continue Reading]